Monica Keena | Planet Claire Quotes

Eric’s POV

Claire. — Tue, 12 Mar 2002 12:39:22 +0000

Eugene: Hey, you know who I had sex with last night? Lucy Liu, Lisa Ling… oh and who’s that chick from Crouching Tiger? Greg: Ang Lee. Eugene: Yes. So hot. I mean TiVO be my pimp, yo. Eric: And that’s from a group eVite, bitch! Greg: Dude this is terrible, man. I hate this. I [...]

Hal and Hilary

Claire. — Tue, 05 Mar 2002 12:38:40 +0000

Lizzie: I feel bad for Hal. He’s lonely. Steven: I know. I just wish he could be lonely by himself sometimes. Hilary: Hal, could you do me a favor? Hal: Anything. Hilary: Dare to believe in yourself. Ron about Kikuki: She doesn’t speak any English? That’s unbelievable. It’s like you found the perfect girl. Rachel: [...]

The Perfect Date

Claire. — Tue, 19 Feb 2002 12:37:34 +0000

Lloyd: Dude, are you wearing makeup? Marshall: Yes I am. Rachel gave me some cover up for my pimple and then I put a little under my eyes. Ron: I thought you looked less tired. Marshall: Thank you. Hal: Steven it’s no big deal. Your mom and I still fight. Hell, we even get it [...]

The Day After

Claire. — Tue, 12 Feb 2002 12:36:34 +0000

Marshall: There’s a stain above where I sleep and I can’t tell if it came down from above or flew up from down here. Ron: Isn’t life just great. Marshall: I’ve seen things no man should see. Steven: Man this is so awesome. The sheets are all messed up like in Basic Instinct. Lloyd: Marshall, [...]

Truth or Dare

Claire. — Tue, 29 Jan 2002 12:35:29 +0000

Marshall: That was awesome. Ron: That was pretty cool. Lloyd: Awesome, that was not. Marshall: Why not? Why wasn’t it? Lloyd: I’ve been thinking this might happen for awhile, but this is sooner than I thought. We have become their brothers. Marshall: So? Lloyd: So I understand, where you’re from being someone’s brother may not [...]

Hell Week

Claire. — Tue, 18 Dec 2001 12:34:40 +0000

Lloyd: Look man, you may have thought we wee mean to you but we never locked you to a tree. Ron: We did, ah, we did bungee him to his bed that time. Books: Hey look, Steven. Your date has arrived. Steven: What am I supposed to do with the sheep? panicked. What am I [...]

Rush and Pledge

Claire. — Tue, 11 Dec 2001 12:33:28 +0000

Steven: Do you guys want to go to that rush party tonight or not? Ron: No. Marshall: No. Lloyd: No. Ron: Fraternities are evil, okay? They brainwash you, they steal your soul. They take your firstborn for godsakes. Lloyd: And you’re the firstborn. Steven: So I guess you guys don’t care about free beer and [...]

Eric Visits Again

Claire. — Tue, 20 Nov 2001 12:32:11 +0000

Steven: You stupid stupid stupid computer. How do you expect to take over mankind if you keep crashing? Eric: If Lizzie ever cheated on me I think I would die. Then you’re already dead. Eric: You better check yourself! Rachel: Wait, Lizzie hooked up with Lloyd? Nobody tells me anything. {Eric celebrates} Was that before or [...]

God Visits

Claire. — Fri, 16 Nov 2001 12:26:53 +0000

Ron: I love college. I just wish I could take my tuition and shove it down that girl’s underwear in one dollar bills. Marshall about Sheila moving out: I’ve never even seen her before. Lloyd: I have. Lizzie’s phone rings Ron: Hi Eric. Eric: Who the hell is this? Why are you answering Lizzie’s phone? [...]

Addicts

Claire. — Wed, 14 Nov 2001 12:19:31 +0000

Ron about the credit cards: The real cards aren’t that big. But they’re good too. Lloyd: Online investing is for desperate fools. Ron: That’s true, right. Except for me though. Dave: Yeah. Virgin plastic. That’s nice, huh? That’s a good feeling. Steven: Don’t rob me. Dave: I could, actually. Dave: What’s your major, Steven? Marshall: [...]