Belles de Jour
Juliet: Wouldn’t want to interrupt your girlfriend’s private conversation. It seemed pretty important.
Nate: She’s not my girlfriend.
Juliet: I was being polite.
Nate: She’s not that either. She’s just a friend of a friend.
Nate: Can I at least get your number?
Juliet: What, it’s not in your friend’s Little Black Book?
Nate seeing Georgina: Oh god, this is not good.
Lily: Georgina, to what do we owe the pleasure?
Georgina to the waiter: You have 15 seconds to top me off or you’re fired.
Dan: Who could have seen this coming?
Nate: Have you met Georgina?
Juliet: Your friend who lent you his book. What was his name?
Nate: Chuck Bass.
Juliet: And what would Chuck Bass do in a situation like this?
Nate: He wouldn’t be in this situation.
Juliet: And you shouldn’t be either. When you’re ready to talk about what really got you into this place, give me a call.
Double Identity
Nate: I’m sorry for the seven hour long story.
Juliet Sharpe: Are you kidding? Serena took her best friend’s boyfriend’s virginity, ran away to boarding school, bounced from guy to guy. Until dating your married congressman cousin. Fell in love with you and then cheated on you with your friend who’s also her ex?
Nate: Yep.
Juliet: The only thing that would make it better is if one of those boyfriends turned out to be her brother.
Nate: Well does step-brother count?
Juliet: The life of Serena van der Woodsen is like the most complicated Jane Austen novel ever.
Dan to the tune of This Land is Your Land: This loft is your loft, this loft is my loft. Where’s your Aunt Jenny, she moved to Hudson. She wears— leggings…
Nate: Wow. I did not need to see or…. hear that.
Nate: When was the last time you checked your phone?
Dan: Obviously not as recently as you did.
Nate: I’m sorry.
Dan: I know.
Nate: Truth is, I don’t even know how I feel about Serena. I just, I want a clear shot at finding out without —
Dan: You don’t have to say it.
Nate: Yeah. How do you feel about her?
Dan: I was in the middle of trying to figure that out when I was interrupted by the arrival of Georgina’s swollen belly. It was kind of hard to focus after that.
Nate: I’ll take your word for it.
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The Undergraduates
Nate: So Henry. Why do I get the impression you might not have told her your whole life story?
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Touch of Eva
Chuck: Why are you staring at me?
Nate: Philanthropy. Chatting with the help about sports. It’s nice to see you… nice.
Nate about Juliet’s hasty exit: I thought her phone died.
Nate: Look at these pictures of Juliet. She’s coming out of the 116th subway station at 10pm on the night she said she had too much work to go out with me. You were right. She’s gotta be seeing someone else. What do I do?
Chuck: Well the old Chuck Bass would have told you to play the same game, make her jealous. But the new Chuck thinks you should be honest. Tell her how you feel; how much you like her.
Nate: I hope you didn’t lose old Chuck’s number. Eva was just spotted at the park with Blair.
Nate: I covered for you, okay? And I think Vanessa bought it but you know I’m a bad liar. Juliet took her for coffee. What’s going on?
Dan: Um… it’s complicated.
Nate: Does complicated mean you’re cheating on Vanessa?
Nate: Woah woah woah. So now your promises to Blair mean more than your pact with me? Or your relationship with Vanessa?
Dan: Nate, she’s a prostitute.
Nate: What?
Dan: I don’t mean in a gold diggerish, “Eva’s into Chuck’s money” kind of way, I mean she’s like got a web page and a price list. But you can’t tell Chuck. Please please please don’t tell Chuck. Blair wants to deal with this on her own.
Nate: Yeah, I bet she does.
Chuck: Nate Archibald has his “I hate to tell you this” face on.
Nate: Blair’s been looking into Eva’s past.
Chuck: Well we can’t be too surprised about that, can we?
Nate: She found something. Eva is—or at least she was— Chuck, she’s a prostitute.
Chuck: Nathaniel, I may be nice but I’m still me. You think I didn’t already know this?
Nate relieved: Oh, I— Of course you did. Look I’m sorry. Just be careful, okay? Knowing Blair’s she’s going to try and out this whole thing at the party later.
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Goodbye, Columbia
Nate: That’s great you and Vanessa sorted everything out. We should double. Juliet and I are going to this Faculty & Friends mixer tomorrow night at the Hamilton House. You guys wanna come?
Dan: Mm… No.
Nate: There’s free appetizers, Humphrey.
Dan: Oh. Okay. Fine. You wanna go see a movie afterward?
Nate: No can do.
Dan: Oh come on, it doesn’t even have to have subtitles.
Nate: That sounds great. No, Juliet and I have this nice little evening planned after the mixer. Got some nice champagne, new Matteo sheets. And I’m hoping some recently purchased lingerie.
Dan: That’s for her, right? Wait a second, you guys haven’t ah…
Nate: No, I haven’t. I did spend the night at her place but I took a page from the old Humphrey playbook and we just talked and played Scrabble.
Dan: That’s nice. Thanks.
Dan: By the way, thank you for inviting me today. After everything that’s happened between us—
Nate: Yeah yeah yeah. I missed you too. No hugs. You’re not getting a hug.
Dan: Not one?
Nate: Not one.
Nate: Thanks for coming with me, man.
Dan: No problem. I shouldn’t have told you about the cotton swab thing. That was insensitive. But just think about how happy you’ll be with a clean bill of health tomorrow.
Serena: What the hell are you doing? And you, it’s been what, two years?
Dan: I’m a wingman.
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Easy J
Dan: How was your big night with Juliet?
Nate: Totally worth the wait. At least I thought so.
Dan: Huh? What do you mean?
Nate: This morning she bolted. She said she couldn’t skip class.
Dan: So?
Nate: So? I thought she’d wanna hang. You know, maybe have breakfast at Tom’s, stay in bed all day. I don’t know.
Dan: Right, well I’m going to ignore the fact that you have the best problems ever and tell you just not to read too much into it. I know this might come as a shock but maybe she didn’t want to skip class.
Juliet: So… running into each other at a prison. That’s kind of awkward.
Nate: Yeah, especially because you said you were going to class.
Juliet: Were you following me or something?
Nate: No. No. I wasn’t following you, okay? I’m visiting my dad. He’s in for fraud and embezzlement. He just got transferred down from Upstate.
Juliet: Oh my god, why didn’t you tell me?
Nate: Well it’s usually not a part of my A-game pillow talk. I mean it was in all the papers. I thought you might know and I wouldn’t have to talk about it.
Juliet: No. I didn’t. I’m sorry, I wasn’t living in the city then.
Nate: No, it’s okay. It’s nice to have someone to talk to who might understand.
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War at the Roses
Blair: What is he doing here?
Chuck: What is she doing here?
Blair: And who brought the Avon Lady?
Nate: She’s a court stenographer. And there’s a notary on the way.
Serena: We’ve witnessed the Waldorf-Bass wars firsthand. We know you both. You have nuclear capability.
Nate: Sooner
or later one of you is going to press the other’s button and we’re going to end up with nothing but cockroaches.
Nate: So that is the guy that Juliet broke up with me for. He just lied to my face.
Blair: Juliet’s dating him too?
Nate: Too?
Blair: So is Serena. I knew that Juliet was evil. I have to go warn Serena.
Nate: If you left me for that guy you can say so. I mean why is it such a big secret?
Juliet: It’s not what you think. Now if you don’t mind.
Nate: No first you’re going to tell me what’s going on. You’ve lied to me enough.
Juliet: He’s my cousin, Nate. And the reason we don’t want people to know is because he’s a teacher and I’m a student.
Nate: And he’s dating Serena.
Juliet: Oh my god.
Blair: [E]ven if Nate and Serena peeked at the treaty you’re the only one with a motive.
Dan: Actually there was someone else.
Chuck: Is this a joke?
Blair: You did this?
Dan: My sister doesn’t feel safe to live in her own house or be with her parents on their anniversary. She was a different person before she met the two of you.
Nate: Come on Dan. It’s not about Jenny. It may have started out that way but this is about you getting revenge. And you went behind my back to get it.
Dan: I know Nate, but come on. They deserve what they get. I’m not sorry.
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Juliet Doesn’t Live Here Anymore
Chuck: What about you? Things back on with Juliet? A romantic rendezvous?
Nate: No, that’s over. I’m just actually swinging by her place to return her things she left this week. I just gotta get rid of them so I can finally be done.
Chuck: Closure. The unattainable goal. In my personal experience the closest I’ve come to getting it is through mass amounts of hate-sex. But that’s just me.
Nate: I think I’ll stick to giving Juliet her shampoo and copy of The Help back.
Nate: Hey, excuse me. I’m dropping some stuff off for Juliet Sharpe.
Doorman: Who?
Nate: Juliet Sharpe. Uh, 4a, I think it is.
Doorman: I’m sorry, there’s no one named Sharpe in this building. Or Juliet for that matter. At least not in the eight years I’ve worked here.
Gossip Girl: Good morning, Upper East Siders. This is your wake up call.
Nate: Hey.
Vanessa: This is how you return phone calls now?
Nate: I went to Juliet’s apartment today and it turns out she doesn’t live there. She never has.
Vanessa: What?
Nate: Look, I’m sorry, Vanessa. I should have believed you when you said she set you up. Juliet’s a liar and she’s been lying to me this whole time.
Vanessa: Finally. Took someone long enough. But seriously, I appreciate you telling me.
Nate: Enough that you’ll help me find out where she’s hiding?
Vanessa: Let me see. Writing a paper on Hannah Arendt or… a secret mission that might help me clear my name. Let me grab my bag.
Nate: Dan Humphrey at the opening night of the ballet. Let me guess, Serena’s date?
Dan: Yeah. You were last week.
Nate: Yeah. She’s probably just using you to make that Colin guy jealous. Just like she used me at Blair’s.
Dan: Actually she and Colin broke up.
Nate: Is that so?
Nate: Everyone your own age is mad at you so you’re befriending the dean?
Serena: Now it’s our turn.
Chuck: Your obsession with Serena has grown tiresome.
Blair: Just because you have no money and delusions of grandeur does not make it okay for you to be a single white trash female.
Juliet: Nate, this isn’t me. You know that.
Nate: How would I ever believe anything you say again.
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The Witches of Bushwick
Dan: Why are you even here? to Vanessa: I assume you’re responsible.
Vanessa: I totally understand if you guys are still mad at me for what happened with Serena, but obviously you miss each other. I’ll take that awkward pause as a yes.
Dan: Don’t think this means that I’ve been calling out your name in my sleep.
Nate: It’s not like I’ve been writing Mrs. Nate Humphrey in my notebook.
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Gaslit
Dan: Hey man I just got your text. What’s up?
Nate: My mom’s filing for divorce. At least she’s trying to.
Dan: Oh. I’m sorry, man. That sucks.
Nate: What am I supposed to do? You know, how do I stop this?
Dan: You can’t. I know it’s not what you wanted to hear, but if kids could fix their parents’ relationships they would. Hell, if we could fix our own relationships we would.
Nate: That’s your advice? Do nothing?
Dan: I mean, if it helps, I know my parents are happier now than they were. And don’t take this the wrong way but I mean it can’t come as a total shock, right?
Nate: It is. I mean she’s had years to do this. The guy embezzled, he got arrested, he tried to skip bail and then he went to prison. She stayed married to him this whole time and now she wants out? I mean what’s worse is that I feel he’s really changed. I just, I gotta get her to see that.
Dan: Well good luck.
Nate: Thanks man. Actually no. No thanks. Your advice really sucked.
Dan: At the party Serena said she didn’t kiss either of us—that she had no idea what happened. And now this? What if something else is going on?
Nate: Or maybe you just want to think that because it’s easier than the truth.
Nate: Dan, I care a lot about Serena, I always will. Whether she realizes it or not this is how she pulls people back in. And I’m not going to let it happen anymore. Neither should you.
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The Townie
Nate: Looks like someone’s going to have a busy holiday season.
Anne Archibald: Unfortunately they’re all followed up by a polite phone call asking if your father will be attending.
Nate: Ah.
Anne: Or in the case of Lily’s holiday party for Bass Industries, a hand-written note saying she hopes I understand.
Nate: Wow. I guess I always thought the Mean Girls got a little nicer once they grew up and had kids of their own.
Anne: Quite the opposite, I’m afraid.
Nate: So I really appreciate everything you’ve been doing for Dad, and I, you know, wanted to make sure he deserves the chance you’re giving him. So I called our business manager and asked if Dad had been in contact—made any plans for when he got out.
Anne: Please tell me he didn’t book a one-way flight to the Caribbean.
Nate: No, but he did ask about leasing a house outside the city.
Anne: Why wasn’t I told about this?
Nate: He wanted to tell you. Dad begged him not to say anything… alright, he said you’d find out soon enough— it was supposed to be a surprise.
Anne: I wish I was surprised. So he uses our address to get paroled and uses my money to get his own place. Same old Howard.
Nate: I’m sorry Mom.
Nate: I found out about the Rhinebeck House, Dad. You couldn’t even wait two weeks before you started spending her money?
Nate: I’m sorry. I might have—
Howard Archibald (Sam Robards): Jumped to conclusions? Pretty quickly too.
Nate: No, you’re right. I guess this transition’s going to be harder than we thought. I’ll talk to mom.
Howard: Don’t bother. I guess you’re not the only one who assumed I was incapable of doing something nice. I was kidding myself. Two of us alone in the country—the two of us together at all? It’s been over for a long time.
Ben: Hey! Archibald! I’m Ben, I’m Juliet’s brother, alright, you need to find Serena and make sure she’s okay.
Nate: Wait, wait. What?
Nate: When’s the last time you talked with Serena? She’s not answering her phone.
Dan: No, they took it away. It’s part of her therapy.
Nate: Oh, so she’s still at The Ostroff? That’s good I guess. She’s safe there.
Dan: What do you mean? Safe from what?
Nate: I was visiting my dad and I ran into Juliet’s brother Ben. He was really upset and he, ah, seems to think Serena’s in danger.
Dan: From who? Juliet?
Nate: I don’t know. He didn’t get a chance to say. But we should probably go check on her. Can you go? I’m in Staten Island.
Dan: No, I’m with Blair and Damien in Connecticut. It’s a long story, but… alright, meet us at the Van der Woodsens. Serena should be okay where she is but we need to find Juliet.
one week later…
Dan: See I told you. Food is more delicious when you cook it yourself.
Nate: Yup.
That’s why we’re going to end this experiment in middle class living and then call the housekeeper to clean up.
Blair: No way! I stuck my hand up a turkey’s butt. You’re not getting out of your job.
Chuck: Well I’ve provided the location, so I did my part. Now I’m off to New Zealand to enjoy a taste of summer and girls who like sex games in the Rain Forest.
Dan: I’ll help clear. It’s only fitting seeing as I did the shopping, set the table and… oversaw the cooking.
Nate getting up to help: Alright.
Nate: I’m out buying you some new clothes. I know you’ve been locked away for awhile, but no one’s wearing orange this season.
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The Kids Are Not All Right
Chuck: I hear you kept yourself entertained in my absence.
Nate: Nope, that’s not me.
Chuck: That’s right. Your father’s out on parole. How’s it been?
Nate: I know he’s earned the right to blow off a little steam, but it’s been nothing but spas and restaurants and night clubs. I mean shouldn’t he be concentrating on his future?
Chuck: Perhaps you should dock his allowance.
Howard Archibald (Sam Robards) from the other room: Oh yeah! Hey Nate, need one more for a foursome. You in, dude?
Nate: That’s not what it sounded like. But I should go. Good luck.
Chuck: You too.
Howard: You gettin’ soft kid?
Nate: No, I’m getting bursitis. That was mile nine. Maybe we should head back.
Howard: I feel like I’m twenty again.
Nate: I am twenty. I feel like I’m going to puke up a lung. Don’t you have things to do?
Howard: Like what? Something on your mind?
Nate: Just making sure you’re concentrating on the future, is all. Your terms of parole are pretty specific. A job, for one.
Howard: I know what the terms are.
Nate: Which is why my PO already has an interview set up this afternoon.
Nate: You know what? A celebratory sounds like a good after-party. Maybe you could get an advance, pick up the check.
Howard: At the pay grade I’m at, I hope you don’t mind a Halal cart.
Howard: I’m gonna make you proud of me, I promise.
Nate: That’s what you said right before you got caught.
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Damien Darko
Howard: I didn’t want to tell you until everything was settled. I have incredible news. I got a job. A real job. As a financial advisor in a top tier company.
Nate: Are you serious? Dad, that’s great!
Howard: I never thought it would happen again—the suits, the business lunches, the ability to pay my own hotel bills. I can’t stop pinching myself.
Nate: What’s the firm?
Howard: Thorpe Enterprises. I’ll be working with Russell Thorpe himself.
Chuck: I just walked past your dad in a two thousand dollar suit.
Nate: It seems the Captain, who could barely get an interview for a custodial position, got a big executive position with the guy trying to buy your company.
Howard: I just got an interesting phone call from Reina Thorpe. Did you tell Chuck to have me fired? Let me guess, you thought I’d embarrass you.
Nate: The Thorpes are trying to take over Bass Industries. We thought they might be using you just to get information.
Howard: I’m a grown man, Nate. And I’m actually good at what I do. Chuck is family. I would never do anything to jeopardize things for him.
Nate: You do realize that’s a total contradiction though. Being Chuck’s family and working for the Thorpes.
Howard: Word around the office is he’s banging Thorpe’s daughter. Talk about sleeping with the enemy.
Nate: But that’s Chuck’s decision, okay? And whatever happens is on him and him alone. You need this second chance. You can’t go down in another scandal.
Howard: So you’re getting me fired instead? All those nights in prison, when I thought I couldn’t take it. When I wanted to quit or die or… I didn’t. Because I knew there was still one person out there who believed in me.
Nate: Dad, you’ll get another job.
Howard: Yeah. Washing toilets.
You know what? I think I’d rather live in a halfway house than live with someone that only halfway trusts me.
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Panic Roommate
Nate: Did I hear Reina just leave? What is that, three days in a row now? Things are getting serious.
Chuck: Not fast enough. We’re stuck in this meaningless mind-blowing sex loop.
Nate: I’m sorry to hear that.
Blair: You need to sleep with her right away!
Nate: What?
Blair: I need you to relieve all that pent up tension before my first performance review tomorrow. And you better not be selfish, Archibald! You know what I mean. A woman remembers.
Nate: This is why you’ve been dragging me around?
Blair: What’s the big deal? It’s not like you haven’t done it before. Just think of her as a younger, more flexible Lady Catherine.
Nate: I wasn’t that selfish, was I? {Blair scowls and walks off} Was I?
Blair: Nate, where’s Epperley? We’re having a gift bag crisis.
Nate: How should I know? She left with this guy she knew from Oxford.
Blair: What? How could you let some toft just punt off with her?
Nate: He’s definitely going to try to hook up with her. You should have heard this guy’s accent.
Blair: So help me Archibald, I will tell everyone what your favorite movie is.
Nate: Hey, do not knock the Sound of Music. It’s got nuns and Nazis. Juliet Andrews was hot.
Damien: Archibald. Humphrey. What are you guys doing here?
Dan: Well we came looking for Eric.
Nate: We ran into your dad instead. He’s a nice guy. I mean, at least he was to us. How he is to you after what we told him might be different story.
Damien: Wait! You guys realize what you’ve done? My dad’s gonna cut me off!
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It-Girl Happened One Night
Howard Archibald: I dug around accounting. Bass Industries is more profitable kept whole. So why is Thorpe determined to slice it up?
Chuck: Russell didn’t become a billionaire by making money-losing decisions.
Nate: Look, you told me he had an issue with Bart, right? So maybe it isn’t a business decision. Maybe it’s personal.
Nate: You realize you’re the worst wingman ever.
Howard: That may be so, but I hope you’ll realize I’m trying to be a good father. I came here tonight to find Russell, say hello, and hand him my resignation.
Howard: Lesson learned. Wall Street didn’t need a sequel. In the theaters or in my life.
Nate: Wish I’d been wrong about Thorpe.
Chuck: Wish I had a company I could put you in.
Howard: One good thing I realized tonight. I still got game. As soon as Russell fired me, I had to turn over my key card. So I gave him one. To the gym at the Empire. This is to Thorpe’s office. And this—all the passwords you need.
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While You Weren’t Sleeping
Chuck: Russell manipulated me to make me look like a monster with Lily so Reina would break up with me and I’d lose my one advocate within his company.
Nate: So you’ve said. More than a couple of times.
Chuck: Your Archibald charm can get me the opening I need. Just change the sweater.
Nate: What’s wrong with my sweater? {he sniffs the collar.}
Nate: The best way to get anywhere right now, is through the park.
Reina: You mean walk?
Nate: I’ll escort you. That way you won’t wander off into Sheep’s Meadow. Come on, trust me. It’ll be fast and it’s fun.
Reina: Okay then. Escort away. There aren’t really sheep there, right?
Nate: No. Just a lot of grass.
Nate: You’re from the home of the Hawk’s and you’ve never been skating?
Nate: You know who gets really really good weed? Chuck.
Reina: This really is a day of firsts.
Nate: Gloat all you want to, just… don’t tell anyone I danced to Tick Tock.
Reina: I wouldn’t call that dancing.
Nate: You know who likes ice cream? Chuck. He loves it.
Reina: Nate. I know what you’ve been trying to do all day.
Nate: You do?
Reina: Mm hm.
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Empire of the Son
Reina: Have you told Chuck about us yet?
Nate: We’re an us?
Reina: I like you. But I don’t want to come between you and your best friend. Even if that best friend is Chuck Bass. But we haven’t done anything yet, so you’re free to pull the chute and walk away if that’s what you want.
Nate: That’s not what I want. So I’ll talk to Chuck tonight.
Reina: In the spirit of full disclosure, there’s something you need to know about me. My dad and I… we’re Notre Dame fans.
Nate: Oh no. No, you can’t be. What are you talking about?
Reina: Uh huh. I guess kids are out of the question.
Chuck: I’m looking for Reina. I thought you might know her schedule. Or are you going to stand there and lie to my face?
Nate: Look, we’re just hanging out. Okay? That’s it.
Chuck: I guess the old Archibald charm wasn’t as rusty as you thought. Unlike the knife in my back.
Nate: I talked you up to her like you asked me to. She wanted nothing to do with you.
Chuck: Don’t sugar coat it.
Nate: I like Reina. All right? And she likes me. I didn’t mean for it to happen this way but it did. I’m sorry. What else can I do?
Chuck: There is one thing.
Nate: Finding out your father isn’t the person you grew up idolizing sucks, but it doesn’t mean he loves you any less.
Reina: Then what does it mean?
Nate: It means that he’s human.
Reina: When I was a little girl he was larger than life. Like Superman.
Nate: Yeah, but doesn’t it make you feel a little better to know that he wasn’t?
Reina: You’re smarter than you look, Archibald.
Nate: I get that a lot.
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The Kids Stay in the Picture
Nate: You okay?
Reina: It’s surreal. Everything happening to Lily is because of my dad, and I kind of feel like it’s all my fault.
Nate: Look. It probably woulda happened sooner or later anyway.
Nate: You still thinking about your mom?
Reina: Yes. But not for the reason you think. My dad always said she never tried to contact us. But I can’t help but wonder, since he lied about so much stuff…
Nate: Maybe he lied about her too. You could find out for sure, you know. You can look for her.
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Petty in Pink
Reina: All I know about my mom is her name is Avery Thorpe and she had me when she was twenty-two.
Nate: Maybe you should talk to Chuck about this. He went through something very similar.
Reina: I’m not ready to discuss this with anyone but you.
Nate: Single malt for breakfast?
Chuck: Takes the edge off the coke.
Chuck: Is there a problem?
Nate: With Reina, no. But when you’re ready to talk about whatever’s up with you let me know.
Chuck: Where’s Reina?
Nate: She went back to her hotel. I think your whole Howard Hughes routine is starting to freak her out a bit. It’s actually starting to freak me out too, man. Talk to me.
Chuck: I saw what you two were looking at this morning. The tattered box, old photographs. Is Reina looking for her mother? {silence} It’s a mistake. You have to stop her.
Nate: Look man, I know what happened with your mom was painful, but at least you got some answers. Reina deserves the same and she can handle it.
Chuck: Reina just lost her father. Do you really think she’s ready to be rejected by her mother all over again?
Nate: I’ll talk to her.
Nate: I know you disagree, but I think she should keep looking for her mom.
Chuck: She looked. It wasn’t her. Give it up already.
Nate: So the first lead didn’t pan out.
Chuck: She has to stop! Russell’s parting gift to me was a story about my father. You remember how I told you my dad was responsible for that fire in his old building?
Nate: Uh huh.
Chuck: Russell owned it too. They were partners. He says his wife was there that night. And she died in the fire.
Nate: How do you know he’s even telling the truth?
Chuck: I don’t. But today when that woman wasn’t Reina’s mother I realized how desperately I wanted her to be. So maybe I do believe it.
Nate: What are you going to do?
Chuck: Try to find out the truth.
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The Princesses and the Frog
Nate: It’s four o’clock. It’s smoking jacket hour, man. Why are you still in your robe? Is everything okay?
Chuck: Peachy.
Nate: Oh come on, Chuck. I know you’ve seen the papers. Blair’s dating that prince guy. Can’t be easy.
Chuck: Nathaniel. I wish my problems were as simple as Blair’s royal fling.
Nate: Have you heard from Andrew? Is there proof that what Russell said about your dad is true?
Chuck: Nothing concrete.
Nate: Well that’s better than the opposite, right? ‘Cause Reina’s decided she wants to keep looking for her mother.
Chuck: Oh really? I’d rather she didn’t.
Nate: Come on, Chuck. It’s important to her and me avoiding the subject is starting to come between us.
Chuck: Nate. Reina can’t go digging into the past. As my friend I need you to help me get this done.
Nate: I’ll do my best. Hey. Don’t worry. Blair’s not gonna end up with this guy. We all know it.
Reina: Nate, what’s going on? You surprise me with this dinner and all you talk about is sports.
Nate: What? Come on! The season’s just started. Spring fever is an actual disease you know.
Reina: It feels like ever since that failed attempt to meet my mother you’ve been avoiding talking about it. Her. I gotta admit, I didn’t think you’d scare so easy.
Nate: Reina, I didn’t mean— Look, I’m not scared. Okay? I want to be supportive.
Reina: Then what is it?
Nate: It’s just… II think some things are better left unfound. I don’t want you to get hurt.
Reina: My mother is a part of who I am. I need to know why she left, what happened to her. So I don’t need you or anyone else trying to protect me from the truth.
Nate: Reina, I—
Reina: Thank you for dinner, Nate. But I have some work I need to catch up on back at the office.
Nate: Good to see you survived the night. Maybe now you can actually talk what we’re going to do here.
Chuck: Do? About what?
Nate: Reina. She needs to know about her mother.
Chuck: Nathaniel—
Nate: I was thinking maybe we could tell her together and then show her the letter.
Chuck: Are you out of your mind?
Nate: Between the video tape you told me about and the letter from her mom. Chuck, I can’t let her get her hopes up. She’ll spend her whole life searching for someone she’ll never find.
Chuck: Don’t say anything.
Nate: What am I supposed to do every time she brings up her mother?
Chuck: Lie, I don’t know. You’ll figure it out. Or just stop seeing her.
Nate: Chuck, I actually like this girl, man. what’s wrong with you, huh? You don’t even know how to be in a relationship. Blair’s lucky she escaped you.
Chuck: Hey! Leave Blair out of this. No one understands what we have.
Nate: Yeah, no one understands because it’s not normal. She’s better off with the French guy.
Chuck: You don’t seriously mean that.
Nate: I saw on Gossip Girl that she’s going to some party tonight at the Consulate.
Chuck: Who cares? She always goes to parties.
Nate: This one’s hosted by his family. Apparently he needs to get engaged.
Reina: All my life I thought my mother didn’t love me.
Nate: Reina I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. There was insurance money. A lot of it. Bart probably paid your father off not to say anything to the police but he should have told you years ago.
Reina: He didn’t tell me because he knew the truth was worse than the fiction.
Nate: Hey Reina, it’s me. Listen. You’re right about Chuck. I choose you.
View all quotes from this episode
Shattered Bass
Chuck: So I thought I’d bring some luxury across the river. Brooklyn needs it. It’s all bars, bakeries and babies. No hotel in sight. Charles Place. You up to attend the ribbon cutting?
Nate: No thanks.
Chuck: Still pissed I lied to Reina about my father?
Nate: It was a big lie. Even for you.
Chuck: That’s why I’m stepping out from under his dark shadow and away from the Bass name.
Nate: Whatever you want to call yourself or your hotel, you’re still the same person.
Chuck: And with everything going on I still need my best friend by my side.
Nate: I saw what you did to Blair. I’m gonna stay with Reina for awhile.
Chuck: If you walk out don’t be here when I get back.
Nate: Don’t worry. I’m already gone.
Nate: What the hell?
Reina: Nate. I’m sure you know Jack.
Nate: Yes, unfortunately I do. But why do you?
Jack: I’ll be in touch to discuss details. {to Nate} I should have known you’d still be dining on my nephew’s leftovers.
Nate: You brought in Jack Bass?
Russell: What the hell is going on?
Chuck: Divine intervention. If you consider Satan divine.
Jack: You did get in one good punch.
Chuck: It was a long time coming.
Nate: He was the one who reached out to me to help.
Jack: You see, as much as I love to screw with my nephew, you using me to do it just didn’t sit right.
Nate: What’s on that tape you just put in your jacket pocket?
Jack: I mean I knew you didn’t just want to read your cheating wife’s love letters.
Chuck: All that was in that box was evidence against my father. Even if you went to the authorities, the implications are limited on a dead man.
Jack: So we played follow the leader. Unless you’re into arson porn, there’s obviously something else of interest on that tape.
Russell: I was trying to keep my family together.
Nate: By killing the mother of your child.
Nate: I know you’re upset but you have to trust me on this. Chuck didn’t do anything wrong.
Reina: First Jack, now you. What the hell’s going on, Nate?
Nate: I just think you’ve been through enough pain without digging up more.
Reina: I am not stopping until Chuck feels as bad as I do.
Nate: Chuck’s father didn’t kill your mother…. Yours did.
View all quotes from this episode
The Wrong Goodbye
Nate: What’s going on?
Dan: Charlie said something that kind of weirded me out. I’m hoping it’s just a crazy misunderstanding and not actual crazy.
Nate: What’d she say?
Dan: Well, ah, we were kissing. And then things started to, you know. So then she says, “Call me Serena.”
Nate: What?
Dan: Yeah.
Nate: Woah. Are you sure? I mean maybe that’s just what you wanted to hear.
Dan: Nice one. But yeah. Yeah I’m sure.
Dan: What’s Chuck doing here? Gossip Girl said he was going to rehab.
Nate: Yeah. That’s… another long story.
Dan: What, we’re in St. Jude’s so now suddenly I’m back out of the loop with everything?
Nate: Look I’ll tell you later. I promise.
Reina: Nate, I wanna go home.
Nate: Okay. We can get another cab, go to your hotel.
Reina: I don’t mean the hotel.
Nate: You mean Chicago.
Dan: Hey, what are you doing up here?
Nate: Meeting Serena. You too?
Dan: Why do I feel like we’ve been here before.
Three weeks later…
Rufus: He’s getting twenty years.
Chuck: Sounds fair. That’s how long he kept the secret.
Lily: Well I wouldn’t want to be in his shoes, I’ll tell you that.
Chuck: What about your shoes? When’s that happening?
Nate: Yeah. What are your plans for the summer, Mrs. Humphrey?
Lily: Well I’m going to be getting very pale. This thing doesn’t come off until the fall. Just in time to send my baby off to college.
Eric: Sarah Lawrence is like fifteen minutes. I don’t really think I need to be sent off. A light breeze could take me there.
Nate: You must really be hurting.
Chuck: How can you tell?
Nate: You’re not drinking. I always know it’s serious when even you know you can’t dull the pain.
Chuck: I’m not right for her. We bring out the dark side in each other. When she’s with Louis she shines. That’s the Blair I love. If she needs to be with him to be like that, then that’s the way it should be.
Nate: Well look at that. Chuck Bass maturing.
Chuck: Sad but true, I’m afraid.
Nate: Just spin the globe and pick a point. We can start there and make our way back here. Like old times. Bachelors who don’t have to answer to anybody.
Chuck: You’re a good friend.
Nate: One of us has to be.