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The Impossible Astronaut
Amy: “At the personal intervention of the King, the unnamed doctor was incarcerated without trial in the Tower of London.”
Rory: Okay, but it doesn’t have to be him.
Amy: “According to contemporary accounts, two nights later a magical sphere some twenty feet across was seen floating away from the tower, carrying the mysterious doctor aloft.”
Rory: Okay. It’s him.
Amy: There’s more.
Amy: It’s like he’s being deliberately ridiculous, trying to attract our attention. {about Laurel and Hardy} Are we watching this again?
Rory: Yeah. I’ve explained the jokes. So what are you saying? You really think he’s back there trying to wave to us out of history books? {The Doctor appears on-screen and waves at them}.
Amy: It is the sort of thing he’d do.
Rory: What is it? Amy?
Amy: A date. A time. A map reference. I think it’s an invitation.
Rory: From who?
Amy: It’s not signed. Look. TARDIS blue.
Amy: This is it, yeah? Right place?
Rory: Uh. Nowhere. Middle of. Yeah. This is it.
The Doctor: Howdy.
Amy: Doctor!
The Doctor: It’s the Ponds!
The Doctor: You all need to stay back. Whatever happens now you do not interfere. Clear?
Rory: That’s an astronaut. That’s an Apollo astronaut in a lake.
Canton Everett Delaware III (William Morgan Sheppard): I believe I can save you some time. That most certainly is the Doctor. And he is most certainly dead. He said you’d need this.
Rory: Gasoline?
River: A Time Lord’s body is a miracle. Even a dead one. There are whole empires out there who’d rip this world apart just for one cell. We can’t leave him here. Or anywhere.
Amy: What do we do, Rory?
River: We’re his friends. We do what the Doctor’s friends always do. As we’re told.
Rory: There’s a boat. If we’re going to do this, let’s do it properly.
River: Four.
Rory: Sorry, what?
River: The Doctor numbered the envelopes. You got Three, I was Two. Mr. Delaware was Four.
Rory: So?
River: So. Where’s One?
Rory: What, you think he invited someone else?
River: Well he must have. He planned all of this to the last detail.
Amy: Will you two shut up, it doesn’t matter.
River: He was up to something.
Amy: He’s dead.
River: “Space. 1969.” What did he mean?
Amy: You’re still talking, but it doesn’t matter.
Rory: Hey! It mattered to him.
River: So it matters to us.
River: When you know it’s the end, who do you call?
Rory: Your friends, people you can trust.
River: Number One. Who did the Doctor trust the most? {The Doctor walks casually out of the back}. This is cold. Even by your standards, this is cold.
Rory: I don’t understand. How can you be here?
The Doctor: I was invited. Date. Map reference. Same as you lot, I assume. Otherwise it’s a hell of a coincidence.
Amy: I don’t understand.
Rory: Yeah you do.
The Doctor: I don’t. What are we all doing here?
River: We’ve been recruited. Something to do with space, 1969. And a man called Canton Everett Delaware the Third.
The Doctor: Recruited by who?
River: Someone who trusts you more than anyone else in the Universe.
The Doctor: And who’s that?
River: Spoilers.
The Doctor: Rory. Is everybody cross with me for some reason?
Rory: I’ll find out.
Amy: Explain it again.
River: The Doctor we saw on the beach is a future version two hundred years older than the one up there.
Amy: But all that’s still gonna happen? He’s still gonna die?
River: We’re all going to do that, Amy.
Rory: We’re all not going to arrange our own wake and invite ourselves. So the Doctor, in the future, knowing he’s going to die, recruits his younger self and all of us to… to what, exactly? Avenge him?
River: Uh unh. Avenging’s not his style.
Amy: Save him.
Rory: That’s not his style either.
River: We’ve told him all we can. We can’t even tell him we’ve seen his future self. He’s interacted with his own past. It could rip a hole in the Universe.
Amy: Except he’s done it before!
Rory: And in fairness the Universe did blow up.
River stepping out of the TARDIS: They’re Americans!
The Doctor: Don’t shoot! Definitely no shooting.
Rory: Don’t shoot us either! Very much not in need of getting shot.
Rory: You okay? Coping? {Canton just sort of spins around}.
Delaware: It’s bigger on the inside.
Rory: Yeah, you get used to it.
Delaware: It’s ah…
The Doctor: Are you taking care of this?
Rory: Why is it always my turn?
Amy: ‘Cause you’re the newest.
Delaware: We’ve moved. How can we have we moved?
The Doctor: You haven’t even got to space travel yet.
Rory: I was going to cover it with time travel.
Delaware: Time travel?
Delaware: So what’s going on here?
The Doctor: Uh… nothing. She’s just a friend.
Rory: I think he’s talking about the possible alien incursion.
The Doctor: Rory, would you mind going with her?
Rory: Yeah. A bit.
The Doctor: Then I appreciate it more.
Rory: Is this sensible?
River: God I hope not.
Rory: You and the Doctor. I can kind of picture it.
Rory: What did you mean— what you said to Amy. There’s a worse day coming for you?
River: When I first met the Doctor—a long long time ago—he knew all about me. Think about that. Impressionable young girl and suddenly this man just drops out of the sky. He’s clever and mad and wonderful and… and knows every last thing about her. Imagine what that does to a girl.
Rory: I don’t really have to.
River: Trouble is, it’s all back to front. My past is his future. We’re travelling in opposite directions. Every time we meet I know him more, he knows me less. I live for the days when I see him. But I know that every time I do he’ll be one step further away. The day’s coming when I’ll look into that man’s eyes—my Doctor—and he won’t have the faintest idea who I am. And I think it’s going to kill me.
Day of the Moon
Glen Canyon Dam – Arizona
Rory: What are you waiting for?
Canton: I’m waiting for you to run. It’ll look better if I shot you while you’re running. Then again— {he aims} looks aren’t everything.
Rory: These things could really do with air holes!
Canton: Never had a complaint before.
The Doctor: So! Three months. What have we found out?
Rory: Well they are everywhere. Every state in America.
The Doctor: Not just America, the entire world.
River: There’s a greater concentration here though.
Canton: So you’ve seen them, but you don’t remember them?
River: You’ve seen them too. That night at the warehouse. Remember? While you were pretending to hunt us down we saw hundreds of those things. We still don’t know what they look like.
Rory: It’s like they edit themselves out of your memory as soon as you look away. The exact second you’re not looking at them you can’t remember anything.
Canton: How long have they been here?
Amy: That’s what we’ve spent the last three months trying to find out.
Rory: Yeah, not easy if you can’t remember anything you discover.
Rory: Where is she, Doctor?
River checking the spacesuit: It’s empty.
Amy: Dark. So dark. I don’t know where I am. Please, can anybody hear me?
Rory: They took this out of her. How did they do that, Doctor? Why can I still hear her?
River: Is it a recording?
The Doctor: Um, it defaults to live. This is current. Wherever she is right now, this is what she’s saying.
Rory: Amy, can you hear me? We’re coming for you. Wherever you are we’re coming, I swear.
The Doctor: She can’t hear you. I’m so sorry. It’s one-way.
Rory: She can always hear me, Doctor. Always. Wherever she is and she always knows that I am coming for her, do you understand me? Always.
The Doctor: She’ll be safe for now. No point in a dead hostage.
Rory: Can’t you save her?
The Doctor: I can track that signal back, take us right to her.
Rory: Then why haven’t you?
The Doctor: Because then what? I find her and then what do I do? This isn’t an alien invasion, they live here. This is their empire. This is kicking the Romans out of Rome.
Rory: Rome fell.
The Doctor: I know. I was there.
Rory: So was I.
The Doctor: Personal question?
Rory: Seriously? You?
The Doctor: Do you ever remember it? Two thousand years waiting for Amy? The Last Centurion.
Rory: No.
The Doctor: Are you lying?
Rory: Of course I’m lying.
The Doctor: Of course you are. Not the sort of thing anyone forgets.
Rory: But I don’t remember it all the time. It’s like this door in my head. I can keep it shut.
Amy about the plan: What’s he got?
Rory: Something, I hope.
Rory: We are not leaving without you.
Amy: No! Just get your stupid face out of here!
River: My old fellah didn’t see that, did he? He gets ever so cross.
Rory: So… what kind of doctor are you?
River: Archaeology. Love a tomb.
The Curse of the Black Spot
Amy: Rory? Little help?
Rory: Yeah. Hey, listen, right? She’s not a doxy!
Amy: I didn’t mean just tell them off!
Rory: Ah, Doctor, what’s happening to me?
Captain Avery: She can smell the blood on your skin. She’s marked you for death.
Rory: She?
Captain Avery: A demon, out there in the ocean.
The Doctor: Okay, groovy! So not just pirates today. We’ve managed to [?] a ship where there’s a demon popping in. Very efficient. I mean if something’s going to kill you it’s nice that it drops you a note to remind you.
Dancer (Chris Jarman): Quickly, now. Block out the sound.
Rory: What?
Captain Avery: The creature. She charms all her victims with that song.
Rory: Oh great. So put my fingers in my ears, that’s your plan? Doctor, come on. Let’s go. Let’s get back to the, uh—
Rory: You are so beautiful. I love your get-up. Oh, it’s great. You should dress as a pirate more often. Huh? Hey, hey. Cuddle me, ship mate.
Amy: Rory, stop.
Rory: Everything is totally brilliant, isn’t it? Huh? Look at these brilliant pirates. Look at their brilliant beards. I’d like a beard. I’m gonna grow a beard.
Burly Bearded Guy: Leave the cursed one, Captain. The creature can have him.
Rory: Yes. Please.
Captain Avery: We don’t want a siren coming after us.
Rory: Did you see her eyes? Like crystal pools.
Amy: You are in enough trouble.
Captain Avery: To the rigging, you dogs! Let go the sails! Avanti! Put the [bunting in the sack] of the clews!
Amy: I swear he’s making half this stuff up!
Rory: Well we’re gonna need some kind of phrase book!
Captain Avery: Heave ho, you bilge rats!
Rory: Rats was all I could hear.
Amy: Rory, this isn’t a film. What if I do it wrong?
Rory: You won’t.
Amy: Okay, what if you don’t come back to life? What if—
Rory: I trust you.
Rory: I know you can do this. Of course if you muck it up I am going to be really cross. And dead.
Rory: You can’t tell him. It’s his future.
Amy: I know.
The Doctor’s Wife
Rory: Hey. You’re still thinking about it, aren’t you?
Amy: Shh! We saw him die.
Rory: Yeah. Two hundred years in the future.
Amy: Yes, but it’s still gonna happen.
Amy: What was that?
The Doctor: The door. It knocked.
Rory: Right. We are in deep space.
The Doctor: Very very deep. And somebody’s knocking.
Rory: Is that meant to be happening?
The Doctor: The power, it’s draining. Everything’s draining. But it can’t, that’s… that’s impossible.
Rory: What is that?
The Doctor: It’s as if the matrix—the soul of the TARDIS—has just vanished. Where would it go?
Rory: What is this place? The Scrapyard at the End of the Universe?
The Doctor: Not end of. Outside of.
Rory: How can we be outside the Universe? The Universe is everything.
The Doctor: Imagine a great big soap bubble with one of those tiny little bubbles on the outside.
Rory: Okay.
The Doctor: Well it’s nothing like that.
Idris: It means “the smell of dust after rain.”
Rory: What does?
Idris: Petrichor.
Rory: But I didn’t ask.
Idris: Not yet. But you will.
Rory: We’re not actually gonna stay here, are we?
The Doctor: Well it seems like a friendly planet. Literally.
The Doctor: My screwdriver, I left it in the TARDIS. It’s in my jacket.
Rory: You’re wearing your jacket.
The Doctor: My other jacket.
Rory: You have two of those?
Amy: I told you to look after him.
Rory: He’ll be fine. He’s a Time Lord.
Amy: It’s just what they’re called. It doesn’t mean he actually knows what he’s doing.
Rory: Listen. Whatever happens at least we’re together. And we’re in the TARDIS, so we’re safe.
The House: You’re half-right. I mean, you are in the TARDIS. What a great adventure. I should have done this half-a-million years ago. So. Amy. Rory. Why shouldn’t I just kill you now?
Rory: Killing us quickly wouldn’t be any fun. And you need fun, don’t you? That’s what Auntie and Uncle were for, wasn’t it? Someone to make suffer. I had a PE teacher just like you.
Rory: Two thousand years I waited for you and you did it to me again!
Amy: I didn’t mean to. I didn’t mean to. I’m sorry.
Idris: Hello Pretty!
Rory: What the hell is that?
The Doctor: Don’t worry! Telepathic messaging. {to Idris} No, that’s Rory.
Idris: You have to go to the old control room. I’m putting the root in your head. When you get there use the purple slider on the nearest panel to lower the shields.
The Doctor: The pretty one?
Rory: Where’s Nephew?
Amy: He was standing right where you materialized.
The Doctor: Ah. Well. He must have been redistributed.
Rory: Meaning what?
The Doctor: You’re breathing him. Another Ood I failed to save.
Idris is whispering in Rory’s ear
Rory: I don’t understand. There isn’t a forest in here.
Rory: At the end, she was talking. She kept repeating something. I don’t know what it meant.
The Doctor: What did she say?
Rory: “The only water in the forest is the river.” She said we’d need to know it someday. It doesn’t make sense, does it?
The Doctor: Not yet.
The Doctor: You okay?
Rory: No. I watched her die. I shouldn’t let it get to me, but it still does. I’m a nurse.
The Doctor: Letting it get to you. You know what that’s called? Being alive. Best thing there is. Being alive right now is all that counts.
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The Rebel Flesh
Rory: Doctor, my tummy’s going funny.
The Doctor: Well the gyrator dislocated. Target tracking is out. Assume the position! {the TARDIS eventually stabilizes} Textbook landing.
The Doctor: Behold! A cockerel. Love a cockerel. And underneath a monastery. Ah, thirteenth century.
Amy: Oh. We’ve gone all mediaeval.
Rory: I’m not sure about that.
Amy: Really? Mediaeval expert, are you?
Rory: No, it’s just that, I can hear Dusty Springfield.
Rory: My mom’s a massive fan of Dusty Springfield.
The Doctor: Who isn’t.
Rory: I think we should go.
Amy: Come on!
Rory: I’m telling you, when something runs toward you, it’s never for a nice reason.
Rory: For want of a better word: ow.
Jennifer: I couldn’t get out of my harness. I thought I was going to die.
Rory: Welcome to my world.
Rory: The Doctor’s always saying, “Don’t wander off.” First rule with him, actually. “Don’t wander off.”
Rory: Everything okay in there?
Ganger Jen coming through the door: Just let us live!
Ganger Jen: My name is Jennifer Lucas. I’m not a factory part. I had toast for my breakfast. I wrote a letter to my mum. And then you arrived. I noticed your eyes right off.
Rory: Did you?
Ganger Jen: Nice eyes. Kind.
Rory: Where’s the real Jennifer?
Ganger Jen: I am Jennifer Lucas. I remember everything that happened in her entire life. Every birthday. Every childhood illness. I feel everything she has ever felt and more. I’m not a monster. I am me! Me! Me! Me! Why did they do this to us? Help me, Rory. Help me.
Rory: Are you sure you’re feeling better? No more super-elastic punches?
Ganger Jen: I’m different now. Stronger.
Rory: The Doctor won’t hurt you. He wants to help, Jennifer. Okay?
Ganger Jen: You used my name. You used my name. Thank you! Amy’s a lucky girl.
Rory: Yeah, she is.
Buzzer: Jen?
Amy: No, it’s a ‘ganger. Rory, listen—
Rory: No, you listen. Nobody touches her!
Amy: We don’t really know anything about them yet.
Rory: I know that she’s afraid. And she needs our help.
The Doctor: Rory Pond.
Amy: Rory. Come on.
Rory: Jen’s out there. She’s out there and she’s on her own.
The Doctor: Well if she’s got any sense then she’s hiding. Rory!
Rory: I can’t leave her out there.
The Doctor: Rory!
Rory: I know you understand that.
Amy: Get in here. Get in here.
The Almost People
Rory: Why can’t you just tell me the truth? The Doctor wants you to live. And I’m with him all the way.
Jen: That’s a lovely idea, Rory. But the Flesh want to kill us now.
Jen: It’s just too tough for a girl to turn. Are you feeling strong?
Rory: I’ll break out the big guns.
Rory: Doctor, we can’t just let them die!
The Doctor Ganger: Ring ring!
Rory: Doctor!
The Doctor Ganger: Ring ring!
The Doctor: I said, breathe, Pond. Remember? Well. Breathe.
Amy: Why?
The Doctor: Breathe. {she has a stomach cramp}
Rory: What’s wrong with her?
The Doctor: Get her into the TARDIS.
Rory: Doctor, what is happening to her?
The Doctor: Contractions.
Rory: Contractions?
The Doctor: She’s going into labor.
Amy: What did he say? No, no no. Of course he didn’t. Rory, I don’t like this.
Rory: You’re going to have to start explaining some of this to me, Doctor.
The Doctor: What, the birds and the bees? She’s having a baby. I needed to see the Flesh in its early days. That’s why I scanned it, that’s why we were there in the first place. I was going to drop you off for fish and chips first. But things happened and there was stuff and shenanigans. {to himself} Beautiful word. Shenanigans.
The Doctor: Stand away from her Rory.
Rory: Why? No and why?
The Doctor: Given what we’ve learned I’ll be as humane as I can but I need to do this and you need to stand away!
A Good Man Goes to War
Twenty Thousand Light Years Away
Rory: I have a message and a question. A message from the Doctor and a question from me. Where is my wife? Oh don’t give me those blank looks. The twelfth Cyber Legion monitors this entire quadrant. You hear everything. So you tell me what I need to know. You tell me now and I’ll be on my way.
Cyberman: What is the Doctor’s message? {the fleet explodes behind Rory}
Rory: Would you like me to repeat the question?
River: Oh! Are you boys dressing up as Romans now? I thought nobody read my memos.
Rory: Doctor Song. It’s Rory. Sorry, have we met yet? Time streams. I’m not quite sure where we are.
River: Yes. Yes, we’ve met. Hello, Rory.
Rory: What’s wrong?
River: It’s my birthday. The Doctor took me ice skating on the River Thames in 1814. The last of the Great Frost Fairs. He got Stevie Wonder to sing for me on the London Bridge.
Rory: Stevie Wonder sang in 1814?
River: Yes, he did. But you must never tell him.
Rory: I’ve come from the Doctor too.
River: Yes, but at a different point in time.
Rory: Unless there’s two of them.
River: That’s a whole different birthday.
Rory: He needs you.
River: Demon’s Run.
Rory: How did you know?
River: I’m from his future. I always know.
River: Why on Earth are you wearing that?
Rory: The Doctor’s idea.
River: Of course. His rules of engagement: float like a butterfly, sting like a bee.
Rory: Look ridiculous.
River: Have you considered heels?
Rory: They’ve taken Amy. And our baby. The Doctor’s getting some people together. We’re going after her, but he needs you too.
River: I can’t. Not yet anyway.
Rory: I’m sorry?
River: This is the Battle of Demon’s Run. The Doctor’s darkest hour. He’ll rise higher than ever before and then fall so much further. And… I can’t be with him ’til the very end.
Rory: Why not?
River: ‘Cause this is it. This is the day he finds out who I am.
Amy: Who’s there? You watch it, because I am armed and really dangerous, and… cross.
Rory: Yeah. Like I don’t know that.
Amy: They took her. Rory, they took our baby away.
Rory: Now, Mrs. Williams, that is never ever going to happen.
Rory: Oh god, I was going to be cool. I wanted to be cool. Look at me.
Amy: You’re okay. Crying Roman with a baby: definitely cool.
The Doctor: Ew. Kissing and crying. I’ll be back in a bit.
Rory: Oy! You! Get in here. Now.
The Doctor: Hello! Hello, ah… baby.
Amy: Melody.
The Doctor: Melody! Hello Melody Pond.
Rory: Melody Williams.
Amy: Is a geography teacher. Melody Pond is a super hero.
The Doctor talking to Melody: Well yes I suppose she does smell nice. Never really sniffed her. Maybe I should give it a go.
Rory: It’s a cot.
The Doctor: No flies on the Roman.
The Doctor: Centurion, permission to hug?
Rory: Be aware. I do have a sword.
Rory: That’s probably enough hugging now.
Rory: So her Flesh avatar was with us all that time. But that means they were projecting a control signal right into the TARDIS, wherever we were in time and space.
The Doctor: Yeah. They’re very clever.
Amy: Who are?
Rory: Whoever wants our baby.
Amy: Why do they want her?
The Doctor: Exactly.
Rory: Is there anything you’re not telling us? You knew Amy wasn’t real, you never said.
The Doctor: I couldn’t be sure they weren’t listening.
Amy: But you always hold out on us. Please, this time. Doctor, it’s our baby. Tell us something. One little thing.
The Doctor: It’s mine.
Rory: What is?
The Doctor: The cot. It’s my cot. I slept in it.
Amy: Rory, no offense to the others, but you let them all die first, okay?
Rory: You’re so Scottish.
Let’s Kill Hitler
The Doctor holds up a newspaper: “Leadworth’s crop circle”
The Doctor: Seriously?
Rory: Well you never answer your phone.
Amy: Okay, you’ve had all summer. Have you found her? Have you found Melody?
The Doctor to Rory: Permission?
Rory: Granted.
The Doctor hugging Amy: You know who she grows up to be, so you know I will find her.
Amy: But you haven’t yet.
Rory: Hang on, what’s this bit? {he points to the line through the word “Doctor”}
Amy: That wasn’t us.
Mels (Nina Toussaint-White): You said he was funny. You never said he was hot.
Rory: Mels!
Amy: What are you doing here?
Mels: Following you. What do you think?
Rory: Um. Where did you get the car?
Mels: It’s mine… ish.
Amy: Oh Mels. Not again.
Rory: You can’t keep doing this. You’re gonna end up in prison.
A Long Time Ago in Leadworth…
Young Rory (Ezekiel Wigglesworth): I thought we were playing hide-and-seek. I’ve been hiding for hours.
Amelia: Well. We just haven’t found you yet.
Young Rory: Okay.
Mels: It’s all right for you. You’ve got Mr. Perfect keeping you right.
Amy: He’s not even real. Just a stupid dream when I was a kid.
Mels: I wasn’t talking about him.
Amy: What, Rory? How have I “got” Rory?
Rory: Yeah. How has she “got” me?
Amy: He’s not mine.
Rory: No. No. I’m not hers.
Mels: Come on. Seriously. It’s got to be you two. Oh cut to the song, it’s getting boring.
Amy: Nice thought, okay? But completely impossible.
Rory: Yeah. Impossible.
Amy: I’d love to. He’s gorgeous. He’s my favorite guy. But he’s, you know— Gay.
Rory: —a friend. {to Amy} I’m not gay.
Amy: Yes you are.
Rory: No. No I’m not.
Amy: Of course you are, don’t be stupid. In the whole time I’ve known you, when have you shown the slightest interest in a girl?
Mels: Penny in the air.
Amy: I mean I’ve known you for what, ten years? I’ve seen you practically every day. Name one girl you’ve paid the slightest bit of attention to. {Rory runs out of the room}. Oh my god. Rory. {she runs after him}.
Mels: And the penny drops.
Berlin, 1938
The Doctor: Out! Out! Out! Everybody out! Don’t need to smoke to death. Get out!
Amy: Where are we?
Rory: A room. A war room!
The Doctor: I don’t know what room. I haven’t memorized every room in the universe yet. I had yesterday off.
The Doctor: Mels, don’t go in there. Bad smoke, don’t breath the bad, bad smoke. Bad deadly smoke. Because somebody shot my TARDIS!
Rory: Doctor, this guy. I think he’s hurt.
Hitler: He was going to kill me.
Rory: Shut up, Hitler.
The Doctor: Rory, take Hitler and put him in that cupboard over there. Now. Do it.
Rory: Right. Putting Hitler in the cupboard. Cupboard. Hitler. Hitler. Cupboard. Come on.
Hitler: But I am the Führer!
Rory: Right. In you go.
Rory: I think he just fainted.
The Doctor: Yes, that was a faint. A perfect feint.
Mels: When I was little I was going to marry you.
The Doctor: Good idea. Let’s get married. You stay alive and I’ll marry you. Deal? Deal?
Mels: Shouldn’t you ask my parents’ permission?
The Doctor: As soon as you’re well I’ll get them on the phone.
Mels: Might as well do it now. Since they’re both right here. {silence} Penny in the air. Penny drops.
Rory: What the hell’s going on?
The Doctor: Back back back! Get back!
Mels: Last time I did this, I ended up a toddler… in the middle of New York.
Amy: Okay, Doctor. Explain what is happening, please.
The Doctor: Mels. Short for.
Mels: Melody.
Amy: Yeah, I named my daughter after her.
The Doctor: You named your daughter after your daughter.
Mels: Took me years to find you two. I’m so glad I did. There, you see? It all worked out in the end, didn’t it? You got to raise me after all.
Amy: You’re Melody.
Rory: But if she’s Melody, that means that she’s also—
Mels: Oh shut up, Dad. I’m focusing on a dress size. {she regenerates into…}
Amy: That’s Melody.
Rory: That’s River Song.
River: Who’s River Song?
The Doctor: Spoilers.
River: Spoilers? What’s spoilers? Hang on, just something I have to check.
Rory: Does anybody else find this day just a bit difficult? I’m getting a sort of banging in my head.
Amy: Yeah, I think that’s Hitler in the cupboard.
Rory: That’s not helping.
The Doctor: This isn’t the River Song we know yet. This is her right at the start. She doesn’t even know her name.
River: Oh, that’s magnificent! I’m gonna wear lots of jodhpurs.
River: Well enough of all that. Down to business.
The Doctor: Oh hello. I thought we were getting married.
River: I told you, I’m not a wedding person.
Rory: Doctor, what’s she doing?
The Doctor: What she’s programmed to.
Rory: Yeah but where’d she get the gun?
The Doctor: “Hello, Benjamin.”
River: You noticed. {she fires an empty gun}
Rory: What’s wrong with you? What has she done to you?
The Doctor: Poisoned me. But I’m fine. {thinks better} Well no. I’m dying. But I’ve got a plan.
Amy: What plan?
The Doctor: Not dying. See? Fine.
Rory: Look. I know how this looks. Let me explain everything from the beginning. {he gives a Nazi salute} Heil!
Robot Guard: Heil! {and a punch}
Amy: Can you ride a motorbike?
Rory: I expect so. It’s that sort of day.
Rory: Okay, all of Berlin. How do we find her?
Amy: I don’t know. Look for clues.
Rory imitating her accent: “Clews”? What kind of “clews”?
Amy: Shut up!
Rory: Okay. Okay. I’m trapped inside a giant robot replica of my wife. I’m really trying not to see this as a metaphor.
Amy: How can we be in here? How do we fit?
Rory: Miniaturization ray.
Amy: How would you know that?
Rory: Well there was a ray and we were miniaturized.
Amy: Alright.
Antibody: Welcome. You are unauthorized. Your death will be implemented.
Amy: What’s that?
Rory: I don’t know. It’s your head.
Antibody: Please remain calm while your life is terminated.
Amy: We come in peace!
Rory: When has that ever worked?
Amy: Oh shut up.
Antibody: Please cooperate in your officially sanctioned termination. It is normal to experience fear during your incineration.
Amy: Stop! Or I sonic.
Rory: What are you doing?
Amy: Ah, I don’t know.
Rory: Okay, psychic interface. Just point and click.
Amy: I know, but what do I think?
Rory: I don’t know!
Antibodies: You are unauthorized. Your death will now be implemented.
Amy: I love you.
Rory: I love you too.
Amy: You can’t die now. I know you don’t die now.
The Doctor: Oh Pond. You’ve got a schedule for everything.
Amy: But it doesn’t make any sense.
Rory: Doctor, what do we do? Come on. How do we help you?
The Doctor: No, I’m sorry, Rory. You can’t. Nobody can. Ponds. Listen to me. I need to talk to your daughter.
Rory: Doctor, River was brainwashed to kill you, right?
The Doctor: Well she did kill me. And then she used her remaining lives to bring me back. As first dates go, I’d say that was mixed signals.
Rory: But that stuff that they put in her head. Is that gone now? The River that we know in the future. She is in prison for murder.
Amy: Whose murder?
View all quotes from Let’s Kill Hitler
Night Terrors
Rory: No offense, Doctor—
The Doctor: Meaning the opposite.
Rory: But we could get a bus somewhere like this.
The Doctor: The exact the opposite.
Amy: Well I suppose it can’t all be planets and history and stuff, Rory.
The Doctor: Yes it can. ’Course it can. Planets and history and stuff, that’s what we do. But not today, no. Today we’re answering a cry for help from the scariest place in the universe. A child’s bedroom.
Rory: “Please save me from the monsters.” Who sent that?
The Doctor: That’s what we’re here to find out.
Amy: Sounds like something a kid would say.
The Doctor: Exactly. A scared kid. A very scared kid. So scared that somehow his cry for help got through to us. In the TARDIS.
Amy: Yeah, but you’ve traced it here?
The Doctor: Exactly. {the elevator arrives} Ah! Going up.
Rory: Community support. Just checking up on community… based… things.
Amy: We’ve got to find that kid.
Rory: Maybe we should let the monsters gobble him up.
Amy: Hey. Any luck?
The Doctor: Three old ladies, a traffic warden from Croatia and a man with ten cats.
Rory: What are we actually looking for?
The Doctor: Ten cats! Scared kid, remember?
Amy: I found, um, scary kids. Does that count?
Rory: Maybe it was, you know, junk mail.
Amy: What?
Rory: The message on the psychic paper. Maybe it was just nothing.
Rory: Amy? Amy? Are you here?
Amy: Here. Here! Ow. I’m here, it’s me.
Rory: You okay?
Amy: Yeah. I think so.
Rory: What happened to the lift? We were in a lift, weren’t we?
Amy: Yeah, yeah. We were, I remember getting in and then— {Rory groans} What?
Rory: We’re dead, aren’t we?
Amy: Eh?
Rory: The lift fell and we’re dead.
Amy: Shut up.
Rory: We’re dead. Again.
Amy: Oh shut up. Let’s just find out where we are.
Rory: You know it’s obvious what’s happened.
Amy: Yeah? Really? Because It’s not to me.
Rory: The TARDIS has gone funny again. Some time… slippy thing. You know the Doctor’s back there in EastEnders Land and we’re stuck here in the past. This is probably seventeen-hundred-and-something.
Amy: Yay. My favorite year.
Amy: Bit neglected, wherever it is.
Rory: Let’s find the front door at least. We can work out where we are. When we are.
Amy: Rory?
Rory: Hm.
Amy: Look at this.
Rory: Well, it’s a copper pan.
Amy: No, it’s not. It’s wood. It’s made of wood and just painted to look like copper.
Rory: That is stupid.
Amy: Wait, hang on. There’s a switch.
Rory: Well. Not seventeen-hundred-and-something.
Amy: Stop doing that.
Rory: It’s not me. {they look thoroughly freaked out} Come on.
Rory: Oh, at last. {he goes to open the door} Argh!
Amy: What is it?
Rory: No door knob. Wooden pans, a massive glass eye and now no door knob.
Amy: And this clock.
Rory: What?
Amy: Look. The hands, they’re painted on. {they hear a child’s laughter and footsteps}
Amy: They’re getting closer.
Rory: They?
Amy: It’s just a— It’s a dummy! It’s just a dummy.
Rory: This is weird.
Amy: Yeah, says the time-travelling nurse. Yeah, um, let’s just leave that for now. Come on.
Rory: Why aren’t there any lights? I miss lights. You don’t even miss things ’til they’re gone, do you? It’s like what my Nan used to say. You’ll never miss the water ’til the well runs dry.
Amy: Rory—
Rory: Except lights, I mean. Not water. Lights are great, aren’t they? I mean if this place is all lit up we wouldn’t be worried at all.
Amy: Rory. Panicking. A bit.
Rory: Yeah. Yeah. Sorry.
Jim rushing in: Help me, please! Keep them away from me! Keep them away! {the doll grabs him and turns him into another doll}
Amy: I take it all back. Panic now.
Amy: Was I—?
Rory: Yeah.
The Doctor: Now, did someone mention something about planets and history and stuff?
Rory: Yeah.
The Doctor: Where do you want to go?
Amy: Um…
The Doctor: Mind’s gone blank.
Amy: Well I have just been turned into a wooden dolly.
The Doctor: Excuses excuses.
Rory: It’s tough though. It’s like being given three wishes. The whole universe?
The Doctor: Or universes. Oo! Three wishes. Ali Baba. How about that?
View all quotes from Night Terrors[/nextpage]
[nextpage title=”page 3″]
The Girl Who Waited
The Doctor pointing: Appalapachia!
Amy: Say it again.
The Doctor: Appalapachia!
Amy: Appalapa-
The Doctor: Chia!
Rory: Appalapachia.
The Doctor: Appalapachia!
Amy: Appalapachia. What a beautiful word.
The Doctor: Beautiful word. Beautiful world. Appalapachia. Voted number two planet in the top ten greatest destinations for the discerning intergalactic traveler.
Rory: Why couldn’t we go to number one?
The Doctor: It’s hideous! Everyone goes to number one. Planet of the Coffee Shops. Appalapachia, I give you sunsets, spires, soaring silver colonnades! I give you—
Rory: Doors.
The Doctor: Doors. Yes, I, I give you doors. But on the other side of those doors I give you sunsets, spires, soaring silver colonnades.
Rory: How do we get in?
The Doctor: I don’t know. Push a button. {Rory pushes the green anchor button}
The Doctor: Okay so rain check on the soaring silver colonnades.
Rory: Yeah.
Rory: When and wherever we are is my wife?
The Doctor: Rory. I think I found her.
Rory: What do you mean you found her?
Hand-Bot: Will you be visiting long?
Rory: Good question. Bit sinister. What’s the answer to not get us killed?
Amy: And where have you been? I’ve been here a week.
The Doctor: A week!
Rory: A week?!
The Doctor: I’m so sorry. Aha! Same room, different times. Two different time streams running parallel but at different speeds. Amy, you’re in a faster time stream!
Rory: Why has this got hands?
The Doctor: Organic skin. Ultimate universal interface. Grown and grafted, not born. I mean it’s actually seeing with its fingers. Scanning the room. But why not just give it eyes?
The Doctor: Amy what exactly did you do?
Amy: I just, I came in and I pressed the door button.
Rory: Oh… Amy, there are two buttons. The green anchor and the red waterfall. Which one did you push?
Amy: I pushed the red waterfall.
Rory: I pressed red waterfall and she wasn’t there!
The Doctor: Okay. So you can’t follow her directly in. Oh, it’s never simple! Did you hear that, Hand-Bot? She pressed the wrong button, that’s all. We’re aliens. We didn’t know!
Hand-Bot: Statement rejected. Appalapachia is under planet-wide quarantine. This is a kindness facility. For those infected with Chin-7.
Rory: What?
The Doctor: Chin-7.
Rory: Hm?
The Doctor: The one-day plague.
Rory: You get it for a day?
The Doctor: No you get it and you die in a day.
Hand-Bot: There are forty thousand residents in the Two Streams facility. Please remain in the sterile areas. Visiting hours are now.
The Doctor: Chin-7 only affects two-hearted races, like Appalapachians.
Rory: And Time Lords?
The Doctor: Yeah, and me. Walk into that facility and I’m dead in a day.
The Doctor: That’s the point of the time glass. It syncs up the two time streams for visits. You could be in here for a day and watch them live out their entire lives.
Rory: And watch them grow old in front of your eyes? That’s horrible.
The Doctor: No Rory, it’s kind. You’ve got a choice. Sit by their bedside for twenty-four hours and watch them die. Or sit in here for twenty-four hours and watch them live. Which would you choose?
The Doctor: Amy, I’m taking the time glass back to the TARDIS. Like sat-nav. I can use it to get a lock on you, then smash through it, using the TARDIS to get you out. Until then you’re on your own.
Rory: What are you doing?
The Doctor: Locking it on to Amy. Small act of vandalism, no one will mind. {alarms go off} Ah! That would be the small act of vandalism alarm. Amy, I need you to go into the facility, just for a bit. Find somewhere safe and leave me a sign. Remember, you’re immune to Chin-7, but don’t let them give you anything. They don’t know you’re alien. Their kindness will kill you. Now. Go.
The Doctor: Ha ha! How do I look?
Rory: Ridiculous.
The Doctor: Glasses are cool, see? Oh yes. Hello handsome man.
Rory: Hello.
The Doctor: Hello, Rory-cam.
Rory: Huh? {sees the monitors} Oh, you can see what I see. Fine.
The Doctor: We’re breaking into two streams. Now I can’t go in there, the Chin-7 will kill me and no regeneration. You will be my eyes and ears.
Rory: Rory-cam. Rescue Amy. Got it.
The Doctor: That’s the spirit. Now smashing through a time wall could get a bit hairy.
Rory: Is it safe?
The Doctor: Dunno. Never tried. Best hold on to something.
Rory: Red waterfall. We made it.
The Doctor: Good on us.
Rory: How do we know that we’re in the same red waterfall as Amy?
The Doctor: Focus on the positive. We locked onto Amy’s time stream. {catches Rory staring at the Venus de Milo}. Eyes front, soldier!
Rory: Right, yes. Sorry.
The Doctor: Appalapachians are the great cultural scavengers, Rory. This gallery’s a scrapbook of all their favorite places.
Rory: Bit of Earth, bit of alien, bit of… {sees a big oozing thing} whatever the hell that is.
Rory: Where is everyone?
The Doctor: All right, Rory, switch the time glass on and sonic it. I’m sending a command signal to the screwdriver. Amy’s here somewhere, if I can just get a lock on her. I wonder what happens if we mix the filters. And there they are. Forty thousand time streams overlapping. Red waterfall isn’t one time stream. It’s thousands.
Rory: Are they happy?
The Doctor: Oh Rory. Trust you to think of that. I think they’re happy to be alive. Better than the alternative.
Future Amy: I waited.
Rory: Sorry, what?
Future Amy: I waited for you. I waited!
Rory: Amy. Doctor, what’s going on?
The Doctor: Ah. I think the time stream lock might be a bit wobbly.
Rory: Look, please please—
Future Amy: Duck.
Future Amy: The only way I’ve survived this long is by making the hand-bots think I don’t exist. Don’t touch the hands. There’s an anesthetic transfer in the hands. If they touch you, you go to sleep.
Rory: But you’re still here.
Future Amy: You didn’t save me.
Rory: But this is the saving! This is the us saving you. The Doctor just got the timing a bit out!
The Doctor mouthing: Sorry.
Future Amy: I’ve been on my own here a long long time. I’ve had decades to think nice thoughts about him, got a bit harder to stay charitable once I entered decade four.
Rory: Forty years. Alone?
Future Amy: Thirty-six years. Thanks.
Rory: Oh. Right. I mean. You look great. Really.
Future Amy: Eyes front, soldier.
Rory: Still can’t win then.
Future Amy: In fact I think I can now definitely say I hate him. I hate the Doctor. I hate him more than I have ever hated anyone in my life and you can here every word of this through those ridiculous glasses, can’t you, Raggedy Man?
The Doctor: Ah. Yes. Putting the speakerphone on.
Future Amy: You told me to wait and I did. A lifetime. You’ve got nothing to say to me?
The Doctor: Amy, behind you!
Future Amy: I got old, Rory. What did you think was going to happen?
Rory: Hey! I don’t care that you got old. I care that we didn’t grow old together. Amy, come on, please.
Future Amy: Don’t touch me. Don’t do that.
Rory: It’s like you’re not even her.
Future Amy: Thirty-six years, three months, four days of solitary confinement. This facility was built to give people a chance to live. I walked in here and I died.
Future Amy: Do you have anything to say? Anything, Doctor?
The Doctor: Where did you get a sonic screwdriver?
Future Amy: I made it. And it’s a sonic probe.
Rory: You made a sonic screwdriver?
Future Amy: Probe.
Rory: You named him after me?
Future Amy: Needed a bit of company.
Rory: So he’s like your—
Future Amy: Pet.
Future Amy: Stay or go?
Rory: Sorry, me? No. I’m coming with you.
Future Amy: Then try not to get killed. Or do. Whatever.
Future Amy about the glasses: They look ridiculous.
Rory: That’s what I told him. Still, anything beats a fez, eh? {they both laugh} What is it?
Future Amy: I think that’s the first time I’ve laughed in thirty-six years.
Rory: You saved me.
Future Amy: Don’t get used to it.
Rory: You’ve been crying. A little bit.
Future Amy: Shut up, Rory.
Rory: You have,
haven’t you?
Future Amy: Woman with a sword. Don’t push it.
Rory: You told her to leave us a sign. And she did. And she waited. Oh Amy.
Rory: Why won’t you help yourself?
Future Amy: He wants to rescue past-me from thirty-six years back which means I’ll cease to exist. Everything I’ve seen and done dissolves. Time is rewritten.
Rory: That’s, that’s good, isn’t it?
Future Amy: I will die. And other-Amy will take my place. An Amy who never got trapped at Two Streams. An Amy who grew old with you, and she in thirty-six years won’t be me.
Rory: But you’ll die in here!
Future Amy: Not if you take me with you. You came to rescue me, so rescue me.
Rory: Leave her and take you?
The Doctor: We could take this Amy with us, easy. But if we do then our Amy has to wait thirty-six years to be rescued.
Rory: So I have to choose. Which wife do I want.
Future Amy: She is me. We’re both me.
Rory: You being here is wrong! For a single day, an hour. Let alone a lifetime. I swore to protect you. I promised.
The Doctor: Rory.
Rory: This is your fault.
The Doctor: I’m so sorry, but Rory—
Rory: No! This is your fault! You should look in a history book once in awhile, see if there’s an outbreak of plague or not.
The Doctor: That is not how I travel.
Rory: Then I do not want to travel with you! {he throws down the glasses}
Rory: Look me in the face and say you won’t help her.
Future Amy: I will not help her.
Amy: Rory, where are you?
Rory: Same place as you. A bit ahead.
Future Amy: I remember this.
Amy: Who’s she? There’s no one else here.
Amy: Why are we still here?
Future Amy: Because they leave you. Because they get in their TARDIS and they fly away.
Amy: No. Rory wouldn’t. Not ever. Something must have stopped him.
Future Amy: You did. Or rather, the old version of you. The me version of you. I refused to help them. I won’t let them save myself.
Amy: Why?
Future Amy: If you escape then I was never trapped here. The last thirty-six years of my life rewrites and I cease to exist. That’s why old me refused to help then. That’s why I’m refusing to help now. And that’s why you’ll refuse to help when it’s your turn. And nothing you can say will change that.
Amy: Three words: What about Rory?
Future Amy: Rory? I called my robot Rory.
Amy: You called your robot Rory. So you didn’t call it the Doctor. Or Biggles. Our favorite cat?
Future Amy: Okay, Doctor. Two Streams is back on-air. Right, okay, so this is big news. This is temporal earthquake time. I’m now officially changing my own future. Hold on to your spectacles. In my past, I saw my future self refuse to help you. I’m now changing that future and agreeing. Every law of time says that shouldn’t be possible.
The Doctor: Yes, except sometimes knowing your own future is what enables you to change it, especially if you’re bloody-minded, contradictory and completely unpredictable.
Rory: So basically if you’re Amy then.
The Doctor: Yes, if anyone could defeat predestiny, it’s your wife.
Future Amy: I’m trusting you to watch my back, Rory.
Rory: Always. You and me, always.
Future Amy: ‘Cause here’s the deal: you take me too. In the TARDIS. Me too.
Rory: But that means there’ll be two of you permanently. Forever.
Future Amy: And that way we both get to live.
Rory: Two Amys together. Can that work?
The Doctor: I don’t know. It’s your marriage.
Rory: Doctor.
The Doctor: Perhaps. Maybe if I shunted the reality compensators on the TARDIS, recalibrated the Doomsday bumpers and jettisoned the karaoke bar, yes. Maybe, yes. It could do it. The TARDIS could sustain the paradox.
Rory: She’s doing the macarena. Our first kiss.
The Doctor: Rory, you’ve got eight minutes left. I’m sorry, you’re on your own now.
Rory: I’m not on my own. I’ve got my wives.
Amy: So you think you’re going to come with us, just like that?
Future Amy: Yeah. Just like that.
Amy: Rory, talk to her.
Future Amy: Rory, talk to her.
Rory: Now, ladies.
Amy: Where are you going to live?
Future Amy: Not with you, don’t worry. I’ll go travelling. Pop back for Christmas, maybe Easter.
Rory: Amy, you always said cooking Christmas dinner you wish there were two of you.
The Doctor: I’m sorry.
Rory: What are you doing?
The Doctor: I lied to her, Rory. There can never be two Amys in the TARDIS. The paradox would be too massive.
Rory: You can’t leave her, she’ll die!
The Doctor: No, she’ll never have existed. When we save our Amy this future won’t have happened.
Rory: She happened! She’s there!
Future Amy: I trusted you!
The Doctor: No, she’s not real.
Rory: She is real. Let her in.
The Doctor: Look, we keep this Amy, we leave ours. There can only be one Amy in the TARDIS. Which one do you want?! {he puts Rory’s hand on the lock} Your choice.
Rory: This isn’t fair. You’re turning me into you.
Future Amy: The look on your face when you carried her… me… her. When you carried her, you used to look at me like that. I’d forgotten how much you loved me. I’d forgotten how much I loved being her. Amy Pond in the TARDIS with Rory Williams.
Rory: I’m sorry, I can’t do this.
Future Amy: If you love me, don’t let me in. Open that door, I will. I’ll come in. I don’t want to die. I won’t bow out bravely, I’ll scream and fight to the end.
Rory: Amy. Amy I love you.
Future Amy: I love you too. Don’t let me in. Tell Amy—your Amy—I’m giving her the days. The days with you. Days to come. The days I can’t have. Take them please. I’m giving her my days.
Rory: I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.
Rory: Did you always know it would never work. Saving both Amys?
The Doctor: I promised you I would save her and there she is. Safe.
Rory: Yeah. There she is.
Rory: You all right? {she nods} How’re you feeling?
Amy: Where is she?
View all quotes from The Girl Who Waited
The God Complex
Amy: “Let’s go to Ravan-Skala,” he says. “The people are six hundred feet tall, you have to talk to them in hot air balloons, and the tourist information center is made of one of their hats,” he says. I’m sorry, but I don’t see any huge hats.
The Doctor: Amy, B-key. This could be the most exciting thing I have ever seen.
Rory: You’re kidding.
Amy: How can you be excited about a rubbish hotel on a rubbish bit of earth?
The Doctor: Because, assembled Ponds, this is not Earth. This has just been made to look like Earth. The craftsmanship involved, can you imagine?
Amy: What? And where are we?
The Doctor: I don’t know. Something must have yanked us off-course. Look at the detail on that cheese plant!
Rory: Right, but who would mock up an Earth hotel?
The Doctor: Colonists maybe. Recreating a bit of home. Like when ex-pats open English pubs in Majorca. No, whoever did this I’m shaking his-stroke-her hand-stroke-tentacle.
Rory: Have you seen these? Look at the labels underneath. “Commander Halke: Defeat.” “Tim Heath: Having his photo taken.” “Lady Silver Tear: Daleks.”
Amy: “Heath Barnes: Other people’s socks.” “Tim Nelson: Balloons.” “Novice Prin: Saberwolves.” “Royston Luke Gold: Plymouth.” “Lucy Hayward: That brutal gorilla.” Doctor, what does it mean?
The Doctor: I don’t know. Let’s find out.
The Doctor: Woah! That was quick.
Gibbis (David Walliams): We surrender.
Rory: No, it’s okay.
Gibbis: We surrender!
The Doctor: A chair leg!
Rory: We’re nice.
The Doctor: She threatened me with a chair leg!
Rita (Amara Karan): Who are you?
Howie Spraggs (Dimitri Leonidas): Oh god, we’re back in reception.
Gibbis: We surrender.
The Doctor: I’ve never been threatened with a chair leg before. No. Hang on. I tell a lie.
Amy: Did you just say, “It’s okay, we’re nice”?
Rita: Okay, I need everyone to shut up now!
Howie: Rita, be careful, yeah?
Rita: Pupils are dilated. They are as surprised as we are. Besides which, if it is a trick it’ll tell us something.
The Doctor: Oh you’re good. Oh, she’s good. Amy, with regret, you’re fired.
Amy: What?
The Doctor: I’m kidding. {to Rita} We’ll talk.
The Doctor: You with the face, Howie. You said you were surprised to be back in reception.
Howie: The walls move. Everything changes.
The Doctor: You. Clever one. What’s he talking about?
Rita: The corridors twist and stretch. Rooms vanish and pop up somewhere else. It’s like the hotel’s alive.
The Doctor turning off the music: Quite enough of that.
Howie: Yeah, and it’s huge. There’s like no way out.
Rory: Have you tried the front door?
Rita: No. In two days it never occurred to us to try the front door. Thank god you’re here.
Howie: I’ve worked out where we are.
Rory: Hm?
Howie: Norway.
Rory: Norway?
Howie: See, the US government has entire cities hidden in the Norwegian mountains. See, earth is on a collision course with this other planet. And this is where they’re going to send all the rich people when it kicks off.
Rory: Amazing.
Howie: It’s all there on the internet.
Rory: No, it’s amazing you’ve come up with a theory even more insane than what’s actually happening.
The Doctor: Why haven’t they got us yet? {he touches one} Amy, they’re not real.
Amy: What?
The Doctor: They should have got us by now. Amy, look at me. Focus on me. It’s your bad dream, that’s all.
Rory: I don’t think they’re for us.
Rory: Every time the Doctor gets pal-y with someone I have this overwhelming urge to notify their next-of-kin.
Rory: Sorry. Last time I said something like that you hit me with your shoe. And you didn’t try to sit down and unlace it first.
Rory: Somebody hit me. Or was it Amy?
The Doctor: Have you found your room yet?
Rory: No. Is that good or bad?
The Doctor: Maybe you’re not scared of anything.
Rory: Well after all the time I’ve spent with you in the TARDIS, what was left to be scared of.
The Doctor: You said that in the past tense.
Rory: No I didn’t.
Rory: You know, Howie had been in speech therapy. He’d just got over this massive stammer. Quite an achievement. I mean, can you imagine? I’d forgotten not all victories are about saving the universe.
The Doctor: Oh no. Oh no no no.
Amy: Doctor, what is wrong?
The Doctor: It’s not fear. It’s faith. Not just religious faith, faith in something. Howie believed in conspiracies, that external forces controlled the world. Joe had dice cufflinks and a chain with a horseshoe—he was a gambler. Gamblers believe in luck. An intangible force that helps them win or lose. Gibbis has rejected any personal autonomy and he’s waiting for the next batch of invaders to oppress him and tell him what to do. They all believe there’s something guiding them, about to save them. That’s what it replaces. Every time someone was confronted with their most primal fear they fell back on their most fundamental faith. And all this time I’ve been telling you to dig deep, find the thing that keeps you brave. I made you expose your faith. Showed them what they needed.
Rory: But why us? Why are we here?
The Doctor: It doesn’t want you. That’s why it kept showing you a way out. You’re not religious or superstitious so there’s no faith for you to fall back on. It wants her.
Amy: Me? Why?
The Doctor: Your faith in me. That’s what brought us here.
Rory: But why do they lose their faith before they die and start worshipping… it?
The Doctor: It needs to convert their faith into a form it can consume. Faith is an energy—a specific emotional energy the creature needs to live. Which is why at the end of her note, Lucy said—
Amy: Praise him.
The Doctor: Exactly.
Amy: Don’t tell me, this isn’t Earth, that isn’t a real house, and inside lives a goblin who feeds on indecision.
The Doctor: Nope. Real Earth. Real house. Real door keys.
Amy: You’re not serious.
Rory: The car too? But that’s my favorite car. How did you know that was my favorite car?
The Doctor: You showed me a picture once, said “That’s my favorite car.”
Amy: Rory, it’s too much. Tell him.
Rory: She’ll say that we can’t accept it because it’s too expensive, and we’ll always feel a crippling sense of obligation. {looks at the car} It’s a risk I’m willing to take.
Rory: What happened? What’s he doing?
Amy: He’s saving us.
View all quotes from The God Complex
Closing Time
View all quotes from Closing Time
The Wedding of River Song
Area 52
Rory: You have to put it on, sir.
The Doctor: An eye patch? What for?
Amy: It’s not an eye patch.
Rory: It’s an iDrive, sir. It communicates directly with the memory centers of the brain. Acts as external storage.
Amy: Only thing that works on them. Because no living mind can remember these things.
Rory: The Silence. We’ve captured over a hundred of them now. All held in this pyramid.
The Doctor: Yeah. I’ve encountered them before. Always wondered what they looked like.
Amy: Well put your iDrive on and you’ll retain the information, but only for as long as you’re wearing it.
The Doctor: The Silence have human servants. They all wear these.
Amy: They’d have to.
Rory: They seem to be noticing you.
The Doctor: Yeah. They would.
Amy: So why aren’t the human race killing the Silence on sight anymore?
The Doctor: That was a whole other reality. What are the tanks for?
Rory: They can draw electricity from anything. It’s how they attack. The fluid insulates them. And I really don’t like the way they’re looking at you.
The Doctor: Me neither.
Rory: Ma’am, I’m sure it’s nothing but I should really check this out. They haven’t been this active in awhile. You two, upstairs. Check all the tank seals, then the floors above. Get everyone checking.
The Doctor: Captain Williams, Nice fella. What’s his first name?
Amy: Captain.
The Doctor: Loyal soldier, waiting to be noticed. Always the pattern. Why is that?
Rory: Sorry sir.
The Doctor: Your boss, you should just ask her out. She likes you. She said so.
Rory: Really sir? What did she say?
The Doctor: Well she just sort of generally indicated—
Rory: What exactly did she say?
The Doctor: She said that you were a Mr. Hottie… ness. And that she would like to go out with you for texting and scones.
Rory: You really haven’t done this before, have you?
The Doctor: No I haven’t.
Rory: Attention all personnel, attention all personnel. Please check all the site containment units.
The Doctor: The pyramid above us. How many Silents have you got trapped inside it?
Madame Kovarian: None. They’re not trapped. They never have been. They’ve been waiting. For this, Doctor. For you.
Rory rushing in: They’re out! All of them!
Rory: I’ll wait down here, ma’am. Buy you as much time as I can.
Amy: You have to take your iDrive off.
Rory: Can’t do that, ma’am. I’ll forget what’s coming.
Amy: But it could activate any second.
Rory: It has activated, ma’am. I’m of no use to you if I can’t remember. You have to go now! Ma’am!
Amy: Yes. Yes. Thank you, Captain Williams. {she leaves}
Amy: So, you and me. We should get a drink sometime.
Rory: Okay.
Amy: And married.
Rory: Fine.
The Doctor: River— River! Why do you have to be this? Melody Pond—your daughter. I hope you’re both proud!
Rory: I’m not sure I completely understand.
Amy: Ah, we got married and had a kid and that’s her.
Rory: Okay.
The Doctor: Amy, uncuff me now. {she does}. Okay, I need a strip of cloth about a foot long. Anything will do. {grabbing his tie} Never mind. River, take one end of this, wrap it around your hand, and hold it out to me.
River: What am I doing?
The Doctor: As you’re told. Now. In the middle of a combat zone so we’ll have to do the quick version.
Captain Williams, say, “I consent and gladly give.”
Rory: To what?
The Doctor: Just say it! Please.
Rory: I consent and gladly give.
The Doctor: I need you to say it too, mother-of-the-bride.
Amy: I consent and gladly give.
The Doctor: Now, River. I’m about to whisper something in your ear and you have to remember it very very carefully and tell no one what I said {he whispers}. I just told you my name. Now. There you go, River Song. Melody Pond. You’re the woman who married me. And wife, I have a request. This world is dying and it’s my fault. And I can’t bear it another day. Please, help me. There isn’t another way.
River: Then you may kiss the bride.
The Doctor: I’ll make it a good one.
River: You better.
View all quotes from The Wedding of River Song
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