New Order : Part One
Dr. Elizabeth Weir (Torri Higginson): What can I do for you, Major?
Carter: I want you to reconsider my request.
Dr. Weir: I’m sorry.
Carter: That cargo ship was modified using the knowledge of the Ancients. Now there is no guarantee that anyone will ever be able to figure out how it was done.
Dr. Weir: And as the most likely person on the planet to figure it out, are you saying that if I don’t let you attempt contact the Asgard you won’t even try?
Carter: I would never say that.
Jackson: He wants to arrange a meeting for the purpose of negotiating a treaty.
Dr. Weir: A Goa’uld wants to arrange a treaty with us?
Jackson: Not just one Goa’uld. All of them. The System Lords. And they want to send representatives here.
Dr. Weir: How many planets are protected under this treaty?
Jackson: Um, 26. Twenty-seven if you include Earth.
Dr. Weir: And what good is it if the Asgard aren’t actually available to protect anything?
Jackson: Well at one time they were. More recently we’ve been trading on the threat. Kind of a… bluff.
Dr. Weir: Well Ba’al is about to call the bluff.
Dr. Weir: Okay. We’ll do it.
Jackson: We will?
Dr. Weir: In exchange we want Ba’al’s territory.
Camulus: What do you mean?
Dr. Weir: Well that’s the way it works, right? When one System Lord kills another he takes over his armies, his fleet, his planets. That’s what we want. Everything in Ba’al’s possession.
Amaterasu: What is the meaning of this?
Jackson: The second message. You’ve been recalled because the System Lords decided to test our defenses by sending a ship to attack Earth. It’ll be here within the hour.
New Order : Part Two
Jackson: Tell the System Lords to call the ship back.
Amaterasu: The decision they have made is one of desperation. Forced upon them by your unwillingness to help. Persuading them to change course can only be done in person.
Oshu: With a full council vote.
Dr. Weir: Even if I did believe you, all good faith is out the window at this point. You’re our prisoners.
Amaterasu: We would also like to witness the demonstration.
Jackson: The ship isn’t coming. It was destroyed en route by Ba’al.
Pete: Okay. Pancakes or do I have to call the doctor?
Carter: I am kind of hungry.
O’Neill: What’s going on?
Thor: Your mind has been interfaced with the Daniel Jackson.
O’Neill: What?
Jackson: What?
Camulus: This may come as a surprise to you.
Dr. Weir: I’m not sure anything can surprise me at this point.
Camulus: I wish to request asylum.
Dr. Weir: Well. Seems I was wrong again.
Dr. Weir: How are you feeling?
O’Neill: Not bad. I haven’t had to urge to go anywhere or build anything.
O’Neill: I should be clear. I like the promotion, the paycheck and parking spot. But I don’t really want to be in charge here.
Dr. Weir: Well sadly all those things kind of go together. So I guess you have some thinking to do.
O’Neill: I hate that.
Lockdown
Jackson: Will someone please tell me what the hell is going on?
Dr. Brightman: You’re recovering from a gunshot wound.
Jackson: What?
Teal’c: You have no recollection of the incident?
Jackson: No! Who shot me?
O’Neill: Don’t… change the subject. What do you remember?
Jackson: I went to see Colonel Vasilev and right in the middle of our conversation he collapsed.
Zero Hour
Five Days to Zero Hour
Walter Harriman (Gary Jones): Morning, sir.
O’Neill: Walter.
Harriman: At 0730 this morning, SG-8 made scheduled contact from P6J-908. They requested permission to bring an alien life form back to base for further study. O’Neill eyes him suspiciously. Sir, it’s just a plant. Your 0830 debriefing is SG-2 regarding their recent mission to P8F-809. Folder’s on your desk, along with the personnel files you have yet to review.
O’Neill: How many do I have left?
Harriman: All of them.
O’Neill: Right.
Harriman: Colonel Rudnell has asked me to show you some bunting samples and Captain Corrigan is still waiting for approval on the, uh, buffet menu.
O’Neill: Bunting.
Harriman: He’s your new administrative aide.
O’Neill: Did I order one of these—
Harriman: No, sir.
O’Neill: Do I really need —
Harriman: Yes, sir.
Gilmore: Well. He’s not like other Generals.
Harriman: Actually, he’s not like other… people.
Four Days to Zero Hour
Dr. Bill Lee (Bill Dow): Well the good news is, it hasn’t eaten anybody yet.
O’Neill: Well thank you, Seymour.
Three Days to Zero Hour
O’Neill: Ba’al has three of my people and he’s offered up an exchange.
Camulus (Steve Bacic): For me.
O’Neill: Any idea why?
Camulus: There are many possible reasons.
O’Neill: Pick one.
Two Days to Zero Hour
Gilmore: Sorry to wake you, sir.
O’Neill: Feels like it’s been ten minutes.
Gilmore: It has.
O’Neill: We’re having a little technical difficulty here.
Ba’al (Cliff Simon): Are your friends lives meaningless to you?
O’Neill: Hey! This is not a stall tactic. I would have called you sooner but we can’t dial out at the moment.
Ba’al: Why not?
O’Neill: Well I’m not really sure. Here’s some irony for you: Carter? Would have this thing fixed like that.
No offense there, Siler.
Siler: Uh, none taken, sir.
O’Neill: So, why don’t you just send her on through? Before you know it, you’ll have old camel ass back in your grubby little mitts.
Ba’al: You dare mock me?
O’Neill: Ba’al. C’mon. You should know. Of course I dare mock you.
Gilmore: Is it really wise to provoke him?
O’Neill: It’s what I do.
One Day to Zero Hour
O’Neill: What’s going on?
Colonel Reynolds: General we just wanted you to know—whatever you decide—we’re behind you 100 percent. You just need to give the order and we’re ready to go.
O’Neill: I know you are, Colonel. Thank you.
Icon
Three Months Ago
Tour Guide: First discovered in the Trillium wastelands over 150 years ago and the highlight of our antiquities collection. The Great Ring of Abydon. Researchers estimate the ring to be at least several thousand years old. And while its origin remains a subject of debate, many believe it was created by ancient worshippers to honor their gods. It’s thought that the peculiar symbols on the ring itself represent the names of the gods. However no one has been able to decipher—
Carter: Sorry about scaring the tourists. We’ve made contact with a lot of planets but this is the first time we’ve found ourselves coming out of a museum piece.
Commander Gareth: One of our artifacts suddenly coming to life was a little surprising but that pales in comparison to its purpose.
Two Months Ago
Soren: It is obvious you revere the great ring as much as we do, General O’Neill.
O’Neill: Oh yeah. We love the old gal. Quite possibly for different reasons than you.
Teal’c: You do not represent the people of your world. You merely kill those who believe differently and would stand against you.
Soren: You speak what is on your mind. I admire that.
O’Neill: Actually in your case? He’s holdin’ back.
Soren: I can assure you, our faith is unshakeable.
Teal’c: This is not about faith. This is about a means to power.
Jared Kane: It’s over.
Jackson: I hope so. You may have just made a martyr.
Avatar
Dr. Lee: It’s just a simulation. It doesn’t have to hurt.
Dr. Lee: Hopefully the game will also extrapolate possible solutions and offer them to Teal’c. Well, I mean it’d just be fair.
Dr. Lee: I don’t get it. That should be the end.
Jackson: You’re saying he should have won?
Carter: That was the conclusion of the originally programmed scenario.
Dr. Carmichael: But the chair is not disconnecting.
Dr. Lee: Yeah, and the game’s not resetting the the beginning either.
Jackson: Well that’s not fair. You can’t win a race if someone keeps moving the finish line.
Dr. Lee: He said he wanted it to be harder—more realistic.
Jackson: In reality we haven’t defeated the Goa’uld.
Affinity
Pete Shanahan (David DeLuise): So. How are things in the galaxy?
Carter: You know I can’t talk about work.
Pete: Sorry. I’m still getting used to the fact that my girlfriend’s a superhero.
Doug: You better check yourself. Before you get hurt.
Teal’c: I have checked. I suggest you leave.
Covenant
Alec Colson (Charles Shaughnessy): As you all know, about five months ago our planet suffered a horrible tragedy. Over two thousand American servicemen and women were killed when a meteor shower disrupted global communications and hit a United States Naval carrier group on maneuvers in the Pacific Ocean. I’m here today to challenge the facts of that incident as they’ve been conveyed to the general public. On the day in question, none of our satellites detected a meteor shower. Now I don’t know how many governments around the world are in on this, but I do know we are being lied to. And the truth is being covered up.
Carter watching the press conference: Uh oh.
Colson: Ladies and gentlemen, there is life beyond our world. There are aliens out there and they have a technology far beyond ours and they have been intervening in our existence for quite some time. I have proof. And I am giving the governments of all the nations that are aware of this 24 hours to reveal the truth. Or I’m going to do it for them.
Colson: I’m a big fan. Pyramids as landing pads for alien ships? Fascinating.
Jackson: Uh, that was a long time ago.
Colson: Yeah, what have you been up to since? It’s like you just dropped off the map.
Jackson: I’ve been around.
Brian: Alec, it doesn’t matter who we are. Or how right we are. They can stop us if they really want to.
Colson: Come on, Brian. What are they going to do, hm? Have me killed?
Colson: Yesterday I told you of our belief in the existence of intelligent life beyond our planet. I also told you that we believe several governments—including our own—have known abut this. And have been concealing the information for quite some time. Yesterday I challenged those governments to come clean; reveal the truth. We got only silence. Which gives me no choice but to present to you what evidence I have. How do I know for sure that alien life really does exist? Ladies and gentlemen, seeing is believing. An Asgard is ushered into the room.
O’Neill: Well I’d call that something.
Aide: How are we supposed to convince the world of alien intelligence when this guy doesn’t have any?
O’Neill: Well the Pentagon has lost all patience.
Jackson: What do they going to do?
O’Neill: They want us to put a stop to it.
Carter: How?
O’Neill: We’re calling in a marker. nothing happens. Yep… calling in a marker.
Thor beaming in: Greetings.
Colson: I won’t be stopped, Sam. I promise you one way or another the world is going to learn the truth.
Colson: Okay. What just happened?
Jackson: Well in layman’s terms we just beamed you up. And then… down again.
Colson: This isn’t a game, Sam. What you guys are doing up here. This is life and death for all of us.
Carter: We know that.
Colson: And no one will ever know.
Carter: Welcome to my world.
Sacrifices
O’Neill: Fellas! How was the trip?
Teal’c: I have been betrayed by those I trusted most.
O’Neill: That good, eh?
Bra’tac: His mood is foul indeed. Greetings. It is good to see you both.
Jackson: Bra’tac, what’s going on?
Bra’tac: There was a complication.
O’Neill: Ishta?
Bra’tac: She is well. And as lovely as ever, O’Neill. The problem, I fear, lies with Ry’ac.
Jackson: Is he okay?
Bra’tac: He is in love. And plans to be married.
Bra’tac: I have consulted with Ishta on the matter. And despite the evacuation of Hak’tyl, she wishes the wedding to proceed as planned. And as scheduled.
O’Neill: Meaning here.
A more suitable world is not likely to be found in time. Delaying the ceremony would only grant another victory to Moloc’s tyranny.
O’Neill: Do you know what it took to get approval for Tailgate Tuesdays? Will there be cake?
Kar’yn: I kneel before no man, not even my husband.
Bra’tac: This action has been part of the ceremony for thousands of years.
Kar’yn: Then he should kneel before me as well! Or am I too weak to have such respect given to me in return?
Rya’c: You disgrace my name.
Bra’tac: Perhaps if we took a short recess.
Kar’yn: If you insist on treating me like a fragile handmaiden then I have chosen poorly for a husband!
Rya’c: Well perhaps I have chosen poorly as well! [She storms off]
Bra’tac: I can see why one must rehearse these events.
Rya’c: Then he insults Kar’yn. She is a formidable warrior who deserves his respect.
Bra’tac: And yours.
Ka’lel: We will not abandon Ishta. We insist a rescue mission be devised immediately.
O’Neill: We’re devising.
Bra’tac: May you love and fight like warriors. Just not with each other.
Endgame
Technician: Let me ask you something. This late at night, there’s not that many people around. Do you get the urge to just dial up the Gate and check out another planet, just for a few minutes?
Harriman: That’d be no.
Technician: Yeah. Me… me neither.
Technician: The Gate’s gone.
Harriman: I can see that.
Technician: Are we going to get in trouble for this?
M’Zel: Teal’c. I have received word from our Jaffa brothers. Three more Goa’uld planets have been attacked. Millions are dead.
Hoskins: This position’s compromised. We need to get out of here now.
Brooks: Yes sir.
Jennings: What about them?
Hoskins: We can’t take them with us.
Jackson: I don’t mind going for a little ride.
Carter: Me neither.
Gemini
O’Neill: Alright, you got our attention. Who are you?
Repli-Carter: My name is Samantha Carter.
O’Neill: Alright. We’ve got a little conflict with that statement. We’ve already got one here.
Repli-Carter: There are two of us.
O’Neill: If only.
Repli-Carter: I was made in Samantha Carter’s image. I know what she knows. Feel what she feels.
Carter: You were made. Who made you?
Repli-Carter: The one you call Fifth.
Carter: Oh my god. She’s a replicator.
Carter: What is it?
Repli-Carter: He’s found me. He’s on his way.
Carter: What about the cipher? Did you find it yet?
Repli-Carter: No, I’m still searching.
Carter: How much time do we have?
Repli-Carter: At maximum speed he’ll be here in less than two hours.
Carter: What are you doing?
Repli-Carter: What I came here to do.
Carter: She fired the weapon.
Repli-Carter: Colonel, the Replicator ship is breaking up.
Fifth: Why?
Repli-Carter: You should know. You made me what I am.
Carter: We will stop you.
Repli-Carter: You’re forgetting, I know exactly how your mind works. I know what you’re going to do before you even think of it.
Carter: The fact is, she learned betrayal from Fifth. And he learned it from me.
Prometheus Unbound
Jackson: I’m sorry, what was I saying?
Dr. Lindsay Novak: Oh, you were assuming the Lost City was at the other end of this field trip. She hiccups. Ignore me.
Jackson: It’s hard to.
Vala Mal Doran (Claudia Black): Don’t worry, I’m not going to hurt you.
Jackson: Thank god.
Vala: Much. I hope.
Colonel Reynolds: The control crystals for both sublight and hyperdrive engines are totally fried.
Dr. Novak: Looks like they were deliberately sabotaged.
Hammond: Can they be repaired?
Dr. Novak: In a word? “No.” We need a new one.
Colonel Reynolds: With all due respect, sir, I—
Hammond: Colonel, someone took my ship. I want it back.
Jackson: Hi guys.
Tenat: Who are you?
Jackson: Ah… The name’s Olo. Hans… Olo.
It’s Good to be King
Garan: My Lord, our hunting party encountered these off-worlders by the Gate.
Maybourne: Hey guys! Long time no see.
Maybourne: Where’s Jack?
Carter: General O’Neill is back at the SGC.
Maybourne: No kidding. “General O’Neill”. That doesn’t sound right. Still, good for Jack. Nice to hear he’s doing so well for himself.
Teal’c: As, evidently, are you.
Maybourne: I get to name all kinds of stuff. You should see the Grateful Dead burial grounds.
Teal’c: What is it?
Maybourne: It’s a record of this planet’s history covering all events. Only some of them haven’t happened yet.
Maybourne: Jack. Great to see you. How long has it been?
O’Neill: Oh, since you got us stranded off-world and tried to kill me.
Maybourne: That takes me back. I guess congratulations are in order. You made General.
O’Neill: You made King.
Maybourne: Welcome strangers. I am King Arkhan the First. It is with joyful heart and open arms that we welcome you.
Trelak (Wayne Brady): I am Trelak, First Prime to the Great Lord Ares, your God. Who will be returning to reclaim this land and his loyal followers.
Maybourne: Of course, of course. Glad tidings of… comfort and joy. Comfort and joy.
Trelak: Know this, Shol’va, I’ll see to it that you suffer slowly.
Teal’c: And I will see to it that you die quickly.
Trelak dying from a stab wound: You are a man of your word.
Teal’c: Indeed.
O’Neill: You sure you don’t want to leave all this?
Maybourne: I can’t abandon these people, Jack. I made a life here. I can’t walk away from my home, my friends, my wives…
Carter: Wives?
Full Alert
Kinsey (Ronny Cox): You want to take down The Trust. I can help you.
O’Neill: I’m sorry, I must have missed an episode. I thought you guys were working together.
Kinsey: You want me to wear a wire?
O’Neill: That’s the deal.
Kinsey: I am not a spy.
O’Neill: Think of it this way: if you don’t do what they want, they’ll kill you. If you don’t do what we want… we’ll let ’em.
Carter: In the event that something does go wrong, I’d suggest we come up with a pre-established signal. Preferably a code word that will let us know you’re in trouble.
Kinsey (Ronny Cox): How about something simple like, “help”?
Jackson: Your English is excellent.
Captain Daria Voronkova (Françoise Robertson): Spasiba. And how is your Russian?
Jackson in Russian: Although I don’t get the opportunity to practice enough, I’m conversational. I suppose I can get by.
Captain Voronkova: Okay. We’ll stick to English then.
Captain Voronkova: Have you eaten a proper lunch?
Jackson: I had something on the plane.
Captain Voronkova: Then the answer is no. Good. I know a restaurant around the corner that serves the best salo in Moscow.
Jackson: Oh, I’m not a fan of salo.
Captain Voronkova: Don’t worry, you will acquire a taste for it.
Jackson: That’s insane. Why would Kinsey want to kill General Kiselev?
Colonel Chernovshev: I’m afraid Mr. Kinsey isn’t exactly himself these days.
Colonel Chekov (Gary Chalk): How could Kinsey have become a Goa’uld?
O’Neill: Five bucks says Carter has a theory.
Carter: As a matter of fact, I do.
Jackson: Why are you so willing to sacrifice yourself?
Goa’uld Kinsey: I assure you, I have no intention of dying on this miserable planet.
Citizen Joe
Operator: United States Air Force. How may I direct your call?
Joe Spencer (Dan Castellaneta): Hi. I’m trying to reach one of your officers. A Colonel Jack O’Neill. Two L’s.
Customer: Well what about the Furlings? Are we ever gonna hear about them?
Joe: Oh, of course. I’m sue we’ll hear lots of stories about them. I mean… I’ll make one up.
Charlene: What if you write them down?
Joe: You mean like a… writer?
Worker: See, I’m not sure you should have sent in this about Seth. It wasn’t one of your best.
Joe: They rejected Hathor? Oh, but it was gold!
Joe: These stories. I think…
Charlene: You think? You think what?
Joe: I think they’re real, Charlene. I’m not making them up. They’re happening. Somewhere. I can see them and it’s because of this stone.
O’Neill: Okay, look. This obviously isn’t your forté. So why don’t you just put the gun down before you get hurt.
Joe: Don’t come any closer!
O’Neill: I know your gun isn’t real. However… mine is.
Joe: Oh god! I’m sorry, I’m sorry. You’re right. It’s just a toy. Please don’t shoot me.
O’Neill: I’m not gonna shoot ya.
Joe: I’m sorry. I just thought it was the only way to make you listen to me.
O’Neill: Oh, where you’re going people will listen. They got nothing to do but listen to what you have to say. They have nice white coats, padded walls. The whole nine yards.
Joe: You have a thing for The Simpsons, fishing, Mary Steenburgen, the color peridot and you’re a terrible ping pong player.
O’Neill: Have we met?
O’Neill: First of all, Joe. I’m not a terrible ping pong player.
Joe: Between you and me, I totally see the analogy: Burns as Goa’uld.
O’Neill: Thank you!
Joe: Dr. Jackson, can I just say, thank goodness you’re back. Not that Jonas was a bad guy, but after all you’ve been through together, you belong here with SG-1.
Jackson: Thank you. Jack?
O’Neill: He’s a barber.
Jackson: Broke into your house?
O’Neill: Yeah.
Jackson: Second week in a row.
O’Neill: Mm hm.
Jackson: Alarm.
O’Neill: I’m thinking dog.
Joe: You could try locking your front door.
Joe: I know the hair makes you look different, but didn’t you used to be more gold colored?
Joe: That’s why the stories were so easy to write! It was like someone else had done most of the work for me.
O’Neill: And you say they all got rejected?
Reckoning : Part One
Lord Yu-huang Shang Ti: What is the meaning of this?
Goa’uld: I should ask you the same thing. Major Samantha Carter.
Repli-Carter: Actually, I’m a colonel now.
O’Neill: You know, we could have used something like this a long time ago.
Jacob/Selmak: The High Council never thought they could trust you with it.
O’Neill: What changed their mind?
Jacob/Selmak: Nothing. They don’t know I took it. My relationship with the Council is still a little strained.
O’Neill: It’s not going to get better if you keep stealing stuff.
Jacob: As I said, given the progress of these battles, the Goa’uld will be wiped out in a matter of weeks.
O’Neill: You know I have to admit, I have some mixed feelings about this.
O’Neill: So what happened? Didn’t you guys have a ship? {Carter and Bra’tac turn to look at the Stargate.} And by the way, where’s Daniel?
Bra’tac: This war must be fought on two fronts. We will re-ignite the uprising and concur our oppressors. While you find the means to stop these replicators. Let us each fight the enemy we know best.
Repli-Carter: You have information that I need.
Jackson: Okay. What do you want to know?
Repli-Carter: I’m afraid it’s not that simple.
Jackson: No, it is that simple. All the same with you I’d rather not do the hand-in-the-head thing.
O’Neill: I’m sorry. We must have had a bad connection there for a second. It almost sounded like you were asking me for help.
Ba’al (Cliff Simon): The replicators are a threat to everyone. Including the countless humans who populate worlds throughout this galaxy. Now I propose that we work together to defeat our common enemy.
O’Neill: My. This is an occasion.
Ba’al: You can not be serious.
O’Neill: Yes I can. I just choose not to… some of the time.
Ba’al: With your insults you are dooming not just your world but all of humanity.
O’Neill: I think big.
Jacob: What the hell was that?
O’Neill: I’m sorry, Jacob. But I’m just not quite ready to sacrifice Teal’c.
Oma Desala (Mel Harris): You are still on the ship. The human form replicator is attempting to probe your mind as we speak.
Jackson: So why are you here?
Oma: Because when she is done, she will destroy you. And when that time comes, you will be faced with a choice.
Oma: If you are seeking an absolute truth you will not find it. Only truth that applies to you.
Jackson: That is so extremely unhelpful.
Oma: The truth is, all knowledge—everything that is and was and will be—is everywhere. Out there. And in all of us.
Jackson: “If you immediately know the candlelight is fire then the meal was cooked a long time ago.”
Oma: Yes.
Jackson: No. You’re trying to understand it, aren’t you?
Oma: It means what you want it to me.
Jackson: No it doesn’t. And you’re not Oma.
O’Neill: I’m so sorry. I was just finishing up a lovely brunch.
Ba’al: Impudence.
O’Neill: No, tuna.
Reckoning : Part Two
Carter: Since Anubis has no real corporeal form, it’s likely he would survive it.
Jacob: He’d have no one left to rule.
Carter: For now. I mean time may not be an issue for someone like him. He could essentially start over. Repopulate the galaxy to his own specifications.
O’Neill: That’s a little audacious.
Teal’c: All of the hardship, the suffering, the sacrifices we have made for our cause will end today one way or another. This battle will decide the fate of all Jaffa.
Aron (Jeff Judge): This is madness.
Teal’c: So too at one time was the very thought of our freedom.
Selmak: If there is an organizing principle to Dr. Jackson’s notes, I have yet to discover it.
Carter: Yeah. He certainly has his own system.
Carter: This may not be possible, you know.
Jacob: Come on, Sam. It can’t be any harder than blowing up a sun.
Carter: You know, you blow up one sun and suddenly everyone expects you to walk on water.
Jacob: So we dial multiple gates simultaneously?
Carter: Not multiple gates. All of them.
Jacob: Every Stargate in the galaxy at one time? Do you know how many Gates there are in the whole galaxy?
Carter: A lot.
Jackson: It’s not just knowledge and information, it’s understanding on a level that you’ll never reach.
Repli-Carter: Why do you think that?
Jackson: Because you’re a machine.
Repli-Carter: So are you.
Colonel Reynolds: We have a problem, sir. Six SGC personnel are trapped on level eight. Cut off from the emergency escape hatch.
O’Neill: Siler?
Colonel Reynolds: Siler.
O’Neill: Oh Siler. Let’s go.
Jackson: You lied to me.
Repli-Carter: What?
Jackson: You promised you’d leave Earth alone. There’s replicators infiltrating the SGC right now.
Repli-Carter: How can you know that?
Repli-Carter: You tricked me.
Jackson: You tricked me first.
Repli-Carter: You can not control me.
Jackson: Not yet. But I’m learning.
O’Neill: I expect to be put in your will.
Siler (Dan Shea): Already in it, sir.
O’Neill: Okay, that’s… weird.
Reynolds: How’s it going in there?
O’Neill: Not well.
Teal’c: Surrender now and you will be granted mercy.
Ba’al: You are hardly in any position to be making such ridiculous demands. You are surrounded.
Teal’c: You are incorrect. It is in fact you that are surrounded by free Jaffa.
Threads
Jim: What do I have to do to get some more coffee around here?
Oma: Find some enlightenment.
Jackson: How do I know this isn’t some sort of replicator trick to stop me from controlling her?
Oma: How deep is the river if you cannot see the bottom?
Jim: Deeper than the coffee in my cup, I’ll tell you that.
Oma: You can’t leave. You’re not ascended yet. Walk through that door you’re choosing the alternative.
Jackson: You’re saying I’ll be dead?
Oma: Pretty much.
Jackson: So you’re saying I can know Anubis plotting to destroy all life in the galaxy and all I can do about it is stay here and contemplate my own enlightenment?
Oma: You can eat your waffles.
Jackson: Can you tell me why you stopped me from killing Anubis the last time I was ascended?
Oma: Because if I didn’t stop you the others would have, and they wouldn’t have been as nice about it.
Jackson: You mean they wouldn’t have erased my memory and left me naked on a planet?
Oma: That was your choice. Okay, maybe not the naked part.
Oma: You just need to be willing to put your prior human existence into the proper context.
Jim: I’ve said too much.
Jackson: No, you haven’t. In fact you’ve hardly said anything at all.
Jacob: It’s Selmak, he’s dying.
Carter: Oh my god, I’m sorry.
Jacob: It’s okay. He’s okay. He led a pretty full life.
Jacob: By all rights, Selmak should have been dead weeks ago. I wouldn’t let him go. I thought we needed him—I thought I needed him to help us stop the replicators.
Jacob: He’s barely alive. I’m gonna die with him, Sam.
Kerry Johnson (Clare Carey): You know there’s just one thing I don’t understand.
O’Neill: Just one?
Kerry: Is the Air Force the only thing keeping you two apart?
Jim/Anubis: There’s nothing you can do. You don’t have the power.
Oma: But I do.
Moebius : Part One
Moebius : Part Two
McKay: I give this no more than a 50-50 chance of this working.
Hammond: According to the tape it worked for eight years.
McKay: Well I’m certainly glad it’s not me going through that… thing.