Empire of the Son

Rufus: We’ll get through this. Lily: You sound so sure I almost believe you. Lawyer: They’re ready for us. Rufus: I’ll be waiting. Lawyer: Lily, this is Assistant District Attorney Vincent. He’s going to be taking your statement. ADA Vincent: Whenever you’re ready, Mrs. Humphrey. Gossip Girl: They say Rome wasn’t built in a day. […]

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While You Weren’t Sleeping

Gossip Girl: Mick, Keith and their questionably-costumed cohorts said, “You can’t always get what you want.” But that doesn’t mean it’s okay for anyone else to have it either. Serena: Sorry if we kept you up last night. We were playing Scrabble. Ben (David Call): She fell asleep to avoid losing. Dan: Since when do […]

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It-Girl Happened One Night

Gossip Girl: It’s cold out there, but on the Upper East Side things are heating up. Because Valentine’s Day is around the corner. Serena: Please don’t tell me you’re leaving already. Between classes at Columbia, your job at W, the only proof that I have you still exist is the faint trace of Chanel in […]

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Panic Roommate

Gossip Girl: A wise woman once said that every morning when you wake up you say a little prayer. After all, you never know what your day may hold. Reina Thorpe (Tika Sumpter): Sorry, I only have an hour before my next meeting. Chuck: Hm. We’ve got no time to waste. …From a warm goodbye. […]

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Damien Darko

Gossip Girl: Brr, Upper East Siders. It’s cold outside. And as February approaches, we need to find ways to fight frostbite. Some keep warm the old fashioned way. Chuck: Do you know what a turn-on it would be to sleep with a woman trying to buy my company. Reina Thorpe (Tika Sumpter): As long as […]

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The Townie

Gossip Girl: Spotted: Dan and Blair exiting Sant Ambroeus with espresso doppio for two. But we hear it’s not the caffeine that’s got them talking a mile a minute. It’s a mission. Dan: So. Juliet dressed up like Serena at Saints & Sinners to destroy her relationships with me and Nate. Blair: And enlist Vanessa […]

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Gaslit

Gossip Girl: Thanksgiving, my favorite holiday. As always I’ll be spending it giving thanks for the bounty of secrets I’ve harvested from you this year. But leave a place for me at your table. I’ll be back for just desserts. Blair: Strolling the Christmas markets with Daddy and Roman. Celebrating the Beaujolais Nouveau at Le […]

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Goodbye, Columbia

Gossip Girl: Morning on the Upper East Side. Where even our own blonde birdie has been spotted flying the coop early to make it to her morning classes. Leave it to Serena van der Woodsen to make geek, chic. Who knew ivy would look so good on her. Serena: Hey! Hey hey. Are you kidding […]

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